Qui sint quibus in hac vita frui valeamus
The Question of Enjoyment
The chapter opens by asking whether, given the nature of charity as right choice, fitting motion, and appropriate use, we can or should enjoy all people in this life.
One point still remains, which the logic of our division compels us to address next. For we said that charity consists in this: that the mind, for the purpose of enjoyment, chooses what it ought, is moved as is fitting, and uses things appropriately. Concerning choice and motion, we have said enough for the present purpose. But if the choice is sound and the motion whole, will the use then be perverse? But in the attainment of the one he loves, both the motion can vary and the judgment can be deceived. For someone can, even with a right intention and a fitting motion, obtain the presence of the one he has chosen for enjoyment; yet in the very enjoyment itself he can change and alter his intention and motion, and exceed the proper measure. But since, in diverse grades and diverse merits, we arranged the neighboring degrees a little earlier, it must surely be said whether we ought to, or even can, enjoy all people, or at least some. But there is a temporal fruit by which we can enjoy one another in this life, just as Paul enjoyed Philemon (Phlm.✦
Temporal and Eternal Fruit
Aelred distinguishes between the temporal fruit of mutual enjoyment in this life and the eternal fruit of mutual enjoyment in heaven, showing that only a few can be truly enjoyed now while the full fruit of love for God is reserved for the life to come.
And there is an eternal fruit by which we will enjoy one another in heaven, just as the angels enjoy each other in the pure unity of their minds. So since to enjoy something is to use it with joy and delight, I think it's clear that in this present life we can't enjoy everything, but only very few things. For it seems to me that we can use some people for testing, some for instruction, some for comfort, and some for support. Indeed, we use enemies for testing, teachers for instruction, elders for comfort, and those who provide necessities for the support of life; but it's only those whom we embrace with a certain warm affection—whichever of these categories they belong to—that we use for the sweetness of life and the delight of the spirit. These, then, are the ones we can also enjoy in this present life—that is, use with joy and delight. And so in this life, as far as the choice and the movement of love that is actively expressed, charity can be shown by all people to all people; but as far as the fruit of that love is concerned, it can be shown by few—or certainly by no one—to all. For they are few—if indeed there are any—by whom the whole human race is loved not only with rational good will but also with heartfelt affection. Finally, to God himself charity is shown by many both in their choice and in their movement of love; but the fruit of that love is not tasted in this life—it is kept for the life to come, in the most blessed vision of him.
The Gift of Spiritual Friendship
The chapter culminates in a luminous portrait of spiritual friendship as the supreme form of enjoyment possible in this life, sealed by Christ's own example of special love for the beloved disciple.
And so for those in whom a certain taste of this sweetness is beginning to stir — in the light of contemplation and in the sweetness of compunction — if you look ahead to the joys to come, they are not yet said to enjoy God, but rather to use him. For it has been shown clearly enough above that to most people he gives a taste of that sweetness not so much as the fruit of love as as a support for weakness. Furthermore, it is no small comfort in this life to have someone you can embrace with a certain deep and most sacred love, someone in whom your soul can rest, to whom your heart can pour itself out; whose welcome conversation you can flee to, like a soothing song in the middle of everything that saddens you; whose friendship's safest shelter you can approach, secure amid all the scandals of the world; to whose most loving breast you can entrust, as though to yourself, the depths of all your thoughts without hesitation; whose spiritual kisses, like healing compresses, can draw out the weariness of your anxious cares; who weeps with you in your troubles and rejoices with you in your blessings, who searches with you in your doubts; whom you can lead, by the bonds of love, into that secret chamber of your mind, so that even if absent in body, he is present in spirit, where you speak alone with the alone; and with the world's noise quieted, in the sleep of peace, in the embrace of love, in the kiss of unity, with the sweetness of the Holy Spirit flowing between you, you rest alone with the alone — indeed, so closely do you join and attach yourself to him, and mingle your heart with his, that from many you become one. Therefore, the ones we can enjoy in this life are those we love not only by reason but also with affection — and above all those among them who are bound to us more closely and intimately by the most welcome bond of spiritual friendship. So that no one would think this most sacred kind of love was something to be disdained, our Jesus himself, condescending to us in all things, suffering and sympathizing with us in all things, reshaped by the expression of his love, granted to one — not to all — the resting place of his most tender breast as a sign of special love: that a virgin's head might be cradled on the flowers of a virgin's breast, and the fragrant secrets of a heavenly chamber, with the scent of spiritual ointments, might pour all the more richly into virgin affections the closer they draw near. This is why, although all the disciples were cherished by the most loving Master with the deepest sweetness of love, to this one he granted, by the special favor of a closer affection, the title of 'the disciple whom Jesus loved' (John 19). 19).
Read the original Latin
Unum adhuc restat, de quo ratio divisionis nostrae deinceps tractare compellit. Diximus enim in hoc constare charitatem, si mens ad fruendum eligat quod oportet, moveatur ut decet, competenter utatur. De electione et motu, quantum ad praesens opus, satis egimus. Sed si electio sana, motus integer fuerit : nunquid usus perversus erit? Sed in ipsius quem diligit adeptione, et motus variari potest, et aestimatio falli. Potest enim aliquis etiam intentione recta, et competenti motu, ejus quem ad fruendum elegit praesentiam comparare; in ipso tamen fructu et intentione mutare et variare motum, et modum excedere. Verum, quia in diversis gradibus meritisque diversis paulo superius proximos ordinavimus, dicendum sane est, utrum omnibus, vel certe aliquibus frui debeamus, aut valeamus. Sed est fructus temporalis, quo invicem in hac vita frui possimus ; sicut Paulus fruitus est Philemone (Philem.
20) : et est fructus aeternus, quo invicem fruemur in coelo, sicut se fruuntur angeli pura mentium unitate. Proinde cum frui sit cum gaudio et delectatione uti, manifestum arbitror in praesenti nequaquam nos omnibus frui posse, sed admodum paucis. Nam ut mihi videtur, uti quidem possumus quibusdam ad probationem, quibusdam ad eruditionem, quibusdam ad consolationem, quibusdam ad sustentationem. Inimicis siquidem ad probationem, magistris ad eruditionem, senioribus utimur ad consolationem, necessaria ministrantibus ad vitae sustentationem ; solis autem his quos suavi quodam affectu complectimur, de quocunque horum genere sint, ad vitae dulcedinem, ac spiritus delectationem. His igitur etiam in praesenti frui possumus, id est cum gaudio ac delectatione uti. Quocirca charitas in hac vita, quantum ad electionem et motum qui in actu est, exhiberi omnibus ab omnibus potest; quantum vero ad fructum, a paucis, vel certe a nullo exhiberi omnibus potest. Pauci enim sunt, si tamen aliqui sunt, a quibus omne hominum genus non solum rationali, sed etiam affectuosa dilectione colatur. Denique ipsi Deo a multis et electione et motu charitas exhibetur, quibus ipsius dilectionis fructus non in hac vita comeditur, sed post hanc vitam in ejus beatissima visione servatur.
Nam et hi quibus in contemplationis lumine, in compunctionis dulcedine, quidam hujus dulcedinis fructus inchoatur; si ad futura gaudia spectes, nec ipsi Deo frui dicendi sunt, sed potius uti. Nam illius dulcedinis suavissimum gustum non tam pro fructu dilectionis, quam sustentatione infirmitatis, plerisque largiri, satis superius monstratum est. Porro non modicum vitae hujus solatium est, habere quem tibi affectu quodam intimo ac sacratissimi amoris unire possis amplexu, habere in quo requiescat spiritus tuus, cui se refundat animus tuus; ad cujus grata colloquia, quasi ad consolatoria quaedam carmina inter tristia quaeque confugias ; ad cujus amicitiae gratissimum sinum inter tot saeculi scandala securus accedas, cujus amantissimo pectori, ac si tibi ipsi omnium cogitationum tuarum viscera sine cunctatione committas; cujus spiritualibus osculis, quasi medicinalibus quibusdam fomentis languores tumultuantium curarum exsudes ; qui tibi collacrymetur in anxiis, collaetetur in prosperis, tecum quaerat in dubiis; quem vinculis charitatis in illud secretarium tuae mentis inducas, ut licet absens corpore, spiritu tamen praesens sit, ubi solus cum solo conferas ; ac quiescente mundi strepitu, in somno pacis, in amplexu charitatis, osculo unitatis, interfluente Spiritus sancti dulcedine, solus cum solo repauses : imo ita te ei adjungas et applices, et animum animo misceas, ut de pluribus unum fiat. His igitur in praesenti frui possumus, quos non solum ex ratione, sed etiam ex affectu diligimus : inter quos his maxime, qui nobis spiritualis amicitiae gratissimo foedere ceteris familiarius, arctiusque junguntur. Cujus charitatis sacratissimum genus ne cui improbandum videretur, ipse Jesus noster per omnia nobis condescendens, per omnia nobis patiens et compatiens, suae dilectionis exhibitione transformans, uni, non omnibus, suavissimi pectoris sui reclinatorium in signum praecipuae dilectionis indulsit, ut virgineum caput virginei pectoris floribus fulciretur, ac thalami coelestis odorifera secreta fragrantiam spiritualium unguentorum virgineis affectibus quanto vicinius, tanto copiosius instillarent. Hinc est, quod licet a piissimo magistro discipuli omnes summae charitatis dulcedine foverentur; huic tamen hoc cognomen familiarioris affectus praerogativa concessit, ut diceretur discipulus ille, quem amabat Jesus (Joan. xix).
Scripture echoes
- ↩Phlm.1.7 — For I have had great joy and comfort in your love, because the hearts of God’s people have been refreshed through you, brother.
Speculum caritatis (The Mirror of Charity) companion
Reorder one love at a time, daily
Use the study map with the free Chosen Portion app's daily readings to work through Aelred at a sustainable pace.
Aelred wrote the Mirror as a rule for daily interior discipline in community, and Chosen Portion carries that discipline forward as a short ordered reading each day.
- All 3 books and 102 chapters mapped into 4 weekly themes with page-level pointers
- Aelred's choice-motion-fruit test, turned into a one-page self-examination worksheet
- 16 discussion questions ready for personal journaling or a 4-session small group