Officialis affectus in quo cavendus sit, in quo admittendus
The Peril and Promise of Service-Born Affection
Bernard introduces the affection born of service as the most dangerous yet necessary affection, urging that gratitude must be embraced but never allowed to become partiality toward vice.
Next comes the affection born of service — more dangerous than any other affection that ought to be admitted. It must indeed be admitted, but it must also be guarded against above all else. For what is so fitting, so in harmony with reason, as to return love for love — to repay the one who loves you with faithful service, and the one who offers gifts with gratitude? What, then, must we be more careful about than this: that we not be seduced by flattering services or enticing gifts into either cherishing the vices of another or showing favor to a vicious person? Nor am I speaking here of those who love gifts and pursue repayments — who treat justice as something for sale and show favor not to the person but to the presents. I am speaking rather of those who, moved by services or gifts, embrace not the gifts themselves but the very person, with a certain inward affection. This affection, I say, must be admitted — but it must also be guarded against. Admitted, so that we are not ungrateful for the service done to us; guarded against, so that what we share is given not to the person's fault but to the person.
From Gratitude to Virtue: The Refinement of Affection
Bernard teaches that affection stirred by kindness must be guided by careful discernment so that love born of service matures into love grounded in virtue, and even when no virtue is found, a simple tempered affection is still to be admitted.
And so, although great discernment is needed in accepting gifts or services, this is what we must attend to: when we are moved by a certain affection toward the one whose benefits or services we enjoy, the worth of the person himself should be more carefully examined. Then, if he proves worthy, the affection born of service may pass into a rational love; and the one we began to love because he was kind to us may come to be loved because he is adorned with virtue. It sometimes happens that an excellent person, because of a certain outward sternness — as we said above — does not easily win the affection of the one looking on. But if, on some occasion, we discover that this person is generous, then imperceptibly the very one whom that sternness had weighed down and, as it were, buried, is raised up — so I may put it — and the affection is stirred up. And the virtue that before was pleasing but did not truly taste sweet to the affection, now, as if to the heart's palate — even though it was directed elsewhere — pours itself in with its own sweetness and fills it. So, in a wondrous way, what was pleasing also becomes truly savored. But if the person happens to be someone in whom there is no virtue to be admired — at least as far as correction of his faults can be desired — the affection should still be admitted. And that simple affection, which, though it is stirred and stirs a person for certain definite reasons, yet embraces the person without regard to any other cause — that affection must be tempered in every respect.
Let Reason Govern the Return of Love
The chapter closes by insisting that repayment of services must be proportioned to each person's feeling, yet the desire for their presence must follow reason rather than mere sentiment.
The very repayment of services or gifts should be bestowed on each person according to their feeling. And so the desire by which their presence is longed for, or the act by which their presence is obtained, should follow reason, not feeling.
Read the original Latin
Sequitur officialis affectus, ceteris qui admittendi sunt periculosior; siquidem admittendus est, sed permaxime cavendus est. Quid enim tam dignum, tam consonum rationi, quam ut vicem rependas amanti, obsequenti officium, gratiam munera porrigenti? Quid deinde cavendum magis quam ne delinitus obsequiis vel muneribus illectus, aut foveas vitia, aut faveas vitioso? Nec de his mihi sermo est, qui diligunt munera, sequuntur retributiones ; qui justitiam venalem habentes, non homini sed muneribus favent; sed de his qui obsequiis vel muneribus provocati, non jam munera, sed ipsum hominem quodam interno complectuntur affectu. Admittendus est, inquam, iste affectus, sed et cavendus: admittendus, ne sit ingratus officio; cavendus, ne non tam homini impertiatur quam vitio. Proinde, quamvis in muneribus vel obsequiis suscipiendis, magna sit habenda discretio, hoc attendendum, ut cum erga eum, cujus beneficiis utimur, vel obsequiis adjuvamur, quodam movemur affectu : ipsius personae dignitas diligentius inspiciatur; ut si forte ejus meriti sit, affectus ipse officialis transeat in rationalem; et quem coepimus diligere, quia nobis gratus, diligi incipiatur, quia virtutibus adornatus. Evenit aliquando, ut vir optimus ob exteriorem quamdam austeritatem, ut superius diximus, non facili affectu, in cor influat intuentis; quem, si aliqua occasione oblata munificum nobis senserimus, insensibiliter ipse, quem austeritas illa oppresserat quodammodo et obruerat, erigitur, ut ita dicam, et excitatur affectus; et virtus quae prius placebat, sed non sapiebat, ipsi affectui quasi cordis palato, licet ad aliud adhibito, sua se suavitate ingerat et infundat; sic mirabili modo delectetur et sapiat. Quod si talis forte fuerit, in quo non sit virtus quae placeat : quantum quidem ejus desiderari potest correctio, affectus admittendus est; simplex autem affectus ille, qui, quamvis certis quibusdam causis moveatur et moveat ; hominem tamen sine alterius respectu causae complectitur, per omnia temperandus.
Ipsa sane obsequiorum vel munerum redhibitio, utrique secundum affectum impendatur. Sic et desiderium, quo eorum praesentia desideratur, vel actus quo ipsa praesentia comparatur, rationem sequantur, non affectum.
Speculum caritatis (The Mirror of Charity) companion
Reorder one love at a time, daily
Use the study map with the free Chosen Portion app's daily readings to work through Aelred at a sustainable pace.
Aelred wrote the Mirror as a rule for daily interior discipline in community, and Chosen Portion carries that discipline forward as a short ordered reading each day.
- All 3 books and 102 chapters mapped into 4 weekly themes with page-level pointers
- Aelred's choice-motion-fruit test, turned into a one-page self-examination worksheet
- 16 discussion questions ready for personal journaling or a 4-session small group