SR
← De eruditione filiorum nobilium (On the Education of Noble Children)/Book 1 · De eruditione filiorum nobilium
Chapter 48Erud.1.48

Qualiter de coniugali statu sit instruenda.

The Five Admonitions from Sarah's Example

Parents should admonish a departing daughter with five duties drawn from the example of Sarah: honoring parents-in-law, loving her husband, managing the household, governing the home, and remaining blameless.

Then indeed, when she departs from her parents to live with her husband, she ought to be admonished by them, just as we read about Sarah, concerning whom it is written in the same tenth book: 'Taking hold of their daughter, the parents kissed her and let her go with her husband, admonishing her to honor her parents-in-law, to love her husband, to manage the household, to govern the home, and to show herself blameless.' Behold, five admonitions. The first is to honor her parents-in-law, which is a matter of humility and patience. For, as Terence writes in the Heautontimorum and Jerome also relates, 'All mothers-in-law hate their daughters-in-law' with one accord. And it is also said in Ecclesiasticus, chapter thirty-seven: 'Do not take counsel with your father-in-law.' Therefore, to honor those who tend to be hateful, troublesome, and burdensome is not without the virtue of patience. The second is to love her husband, concerning whom the apostle also instructs in the second chapter to Titus: 'Young women,' he says, 'exhort them to love their husbands.'✦ Of which, namely:

Four Signs of Conjugal Love: Submission

The first sign of conjugal love is willing submission to the husband through rendering what is owed, showing reverence, and serving him, supported by Pauline teaching on mutual marital obligation.

She ought to show four signs of conjugal love. The first is that she willingly submit herself to him, according to the Lord's command found in Genesis 3: 'You will be under the authority of your husband, and he will rule over you.'✦ Let her submit, I say, to her husband in three ways, namely: by rendering him what is owed, by showing him reverence, and by serving him. On the first point, the Apostle says in 1 Corinthians 7: 'Let the husband render to his wife what is owed. And likewise the wife to her husband.'✦ And likewise the wife to her husband.✦ For a woman does not have authority over her own body, but her husband does.'✦

Reverence, Service, and Pleasing the Husband

The second and third signs of conjugal love are reverence (fearing the husband), diligent service in the household, and attentiveness to pleasing him so as to draw him from sin.

On the second point, it is written in Ephesians, chapter 5: 'Let the wife fear her own husband.' On the third point, Augustine says that 'the law wished wives to be subordinate and almost servants.' Jerome, writing against Jovinian, adds this: 'It is announced,' he says, 'that the husband is coming with companions, and behold — the wife, after the manner of a swallow, surveys every inner room: whether the bed is stiff, whether the floors have been swept, whether the cups are set in order, whether the meal is prepared.'1 So, as Peter says in 1 Peter chapter 3, 'Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord.' The second thing is that she should be attentive to her husband, how she may please him, according to that word of the Apostle in 1 Corinthians chapter 7: 'A married woman thinks about how she may please her husband.' She ought, however, to please him for two reasons, namely: so that she may be loved by him and so that he himself may be drawn back from fornication or adultery.

Patient Endurance and Chaste Guardianship of the Body

The third and fourth signs of conjugal love are patiently enduring a husband's weaknesses—illustrated by the example of Ilia—and chastely guarding one's body for him with voluntary rather than forced chastity.

Third, that she patiently and lovingly endure his weaknesses and defects, just as Ilia did, about whom Jerome thus relates in book one against Jovinian: 'Duilius,' he says, 'who was the first to triumph at Rome in a naval contest, took Ilia the virgin as his wife, and she was of such great modesty that she was held up as an example even in that age in which immodesty was not a vice but a spectacle — that is, a monstrosity.'2 He, therefore, now old and with a trembling body, heard his foul-smelling mouth reproached against him in a certain quarrel, and sad, he betook himself home. And when he had complained to his wife why she had never warned him, so that he might remedy this vice, Ilia said, 'I would have done this, unless I had thought that all men's mouths smell this way.' These things [are from] Jerome. And he adds: 'Praiseworthy in both respects is the modest and noble woman — both if she overlooked her husband's vice and if she bore it patiently, and [praiseworthy is she] because the husband perceived the unhappiness of his own body not as his wife's disgust but as an enemy's curse.' Fourth, that she chastely guard her body for him, according to that word of the Apostle to Titus 2: 'Exhort young women to be chaste.' And this not with forced chastity, but voluntary.

True Chastity Is Interior, Not Merely External

Chastity that exists only because no one has tempted or out of mere fear is false; true chastity must be voluntary and interior, for an adulterous mind corrupts even a guarded body.

Some women are chaste, it's true — but only because no one has tried to seduce them, or because fear has stripped them of the ability to give in to lust. On the first point, Ovid says in his book Remedies: She is chaste whom no one has solicited. On the second point, Tibullus says: Don't be chaste merely out of fear, but out of a faithful mind. Likewise Ovid, without a title, in the third book: If a woman is chaste only because fear has been removed, she is chaste in name only: the one who refrains because it is not permitted does not truly act; the one who acts from within does. So that the body may be well kept chaste, the mind is already adulterous: and it cannot be guarded unless she herself wills it. Nor can you keep the mind chaste, even if you shut out everything. With every outsider shut out, you will be an adulterer within.

Public Reputation and the Proof of Chastity

A chaste wife must guard her public reputation through serious manners and chaste companions, since domestic scandal becomes public shame, and her beauty should be reserved for her husband's eyes alone.

This woman, that man. Jerome, writing against Jovinian in Book Eleven, reports that the wife of Lucius Sulla — Felix, if he hadn't also had Metella as a spouse — was openly shameless. And because we learn of our worst troubles last, this was being sung at Athens while Sulla was unaware; he first learned the secrets of his own household from the taunts of his enemies. From this same source, Martial the cook also writes: You have estates alone and, fair one, coins alone. . . And you have a heart alone, alone a mind. You have everything alone — I don't think you'd deny this — but a wife, fair one, you have along with the people. So that a chaste wife may prove her chastity to everyone, let her keep a serious manner and live with chaste companions.3 For Ovid speaks of the first woman in this way in the seventh book of the Metamorphoses:4 Her appearance and age both pushed her to believe the charge of adultery, yet kept her from believing in her own character. On the second point, Tibullus says: I pray, chaste spouse: may you remain faithful, and may a guardian of holy modesty always sit beside you, diligent and watchful.

The Chastity of Love: Modesty, Freedom from Jealousy, and Natural Adornment

A wife's love must be chaste in three ways: loving her husband as a bridegroom not an adulterer, casting off jealousy, and refraining from painting her face or using false hair.

These are the signs of conjugal love in a wife. Furthermore, a wife's love for her husband ought to be modest and chaste — that is to say, the chastity of love consists in three things, namely: the chastity of love consists in three things, namely: that she love him chastely, as a bridegroom, not as an adulterer; that she cast off jealousy; and that she not paint her face or dye her own hair or weave in another's hair for the sake of pleasing him. On the first point, Jerome says against Jovinian that 'the marriages of certain people have been held together by adulteries.' Hence the same author, explaining that word of the Apostle to Titus — 'exhort young women to love their husbands' — says: 'He wishes a wife to have modest love toward her husband, so that with modesty and bashfulness, and as if out of the necessity of the marriage debt, she renders what is owed to her husband rather than demanding it from him, and so that she believes she is performing the works of children before the eyes of God and the angels, and so that even the privacy of the bed, the darkness of night, and the closed chamber make her blush, since she considers that all things lie open to the eyes of God.'✦ Thus far Jerome. On the second point, it is said in Ecclesiasticus 26: 'My heart has feared three things, and at the fourth my countenance was afraid: betrayal — that is, treachery against a city — and the gathering of the people — that is, conspiracy — and false accusation.'

The Grievousness of Jealousy

Jealousy in a wife is among the most grievous of evils—worse than death—because it brings a scourge of the tongue and destroys peace, as Sirach and Ecclesiastes teach.

That these three are grievous is shown when it is added: 'Beyond death, all these are grievous,' because, namely— Death is better than a bitter life, as is read in the same place, chapter 30.5 Then a fourth is added, which is the most grievous, stated thus: 'It is grief of heart and mourning'—supply 'caused by'—'a jealous woman,' that is, a suspicious one, namely—6 —actively or passively.7 This refers to the woman who suspects her husband wrongly, or the woman about whom a husband is right to be suspicious. For with such a woman one cannot have peace or rest, and it is better to die than to live with her, according to that passage in Ecclesiastes 7: 'I have found a woman more bitter than death.'8 Then the cause of this gravity is expressed, when it is added: 'In a jealous woman there is a scourge of the tongue communicating to all,' that is, sparing no one from insult or slander, about which, namely—9 By a scourge it is said, to a holy and peaceful man, in Job 5: 'From the scourge of the tongue you will hide.'10

Against Cosmetic Adornment: Ambrose and Cyprian

Painting the face and falsifying one's appearance is a sin against nature and God's handiwork, condemned by Ambrose and Cyprian as a betrayal of the divine image that will be judged at the resurrection.

On the third point, Ambrose speaks, and Augustine also cites his words in book three of On Christian Teaching, saying: 'From this source arise those incentives to vice — so that women paint their faces with borrowed cosmetics, while they fear displeasing their husbands, and they practice adultery of expression while contemplating adultery itself.' What madness this is — to seek to change the image of nature with cosmetic paint, and while they fear the judgment of marriage, they have already lost their own. For the woman who paints herself declares as much about her own condition, since she desires to change what she was born with. So while she strives to please others, she has already become displeasing to herself first. What truer judge of your ugliness do we seek, O woman, than you yourself — you who fear to be seen? For if you are beautiful, why would you hide yourself? If you are ugly, why do you lie about being beautiful — neither for the sake of your own conscience, nor for the favor of another, since you are only going to have the credit of deception? . . . You're indignant if he loves another woman rather than you — you who are taught to commit adultery by him. . . In short, the sins committed in adultery are nearly more tolerable, because there it is chastity that is violated, but here it is nature itself.' These are Ambrose's words. Likewise, on the same point, Cyprian in his book On the Discipline and Attire of Virgins: 'As,' he says, ' . . Do not be caught up in unchaste allurements, with cosmetics and enticing dyes, and with things corrupted and violated that belong to God — held fast by what is worse than an adulteress. When you think you're adorning yourself — since this kind of adorning is an assault on God's own handiwork — you're betraying the truth. . . Don't you fear — I beg you, you who are like this — lest when the day of resurrection comes, your Maker will not recognize you, but will turn you away to your own rewards? . . coming. . . Let her shut out the one coming with the force of a censor and a judge, rebuking and saying: "This work is not mine, nor is this image ours." . . The figure is corrupted; the face is foreign." You won't be able to see God, because the eyes you have aren't the ones God made — they're the ones the devil corrupted. You followed him — you copied the serpent's gilded, painted eyes — you're adorned by your enemy, and with him you'll burn. These are Cyprian's words.

Further Testimony Against Vanity and the Example of Jezebel

Women who adorn themselves from empty glory or lustful intent deceive others and themselves, as Sirach teaches, and are like a sack covering worthless contents.

Some women sin even more gravely: not out of any real desire to please men, but under the pretext of pleasing them, they paint and falsify their face and hair — or else from a craving for empty glory, following that line of Ovid's in his book on the Art of Love: Even chaste women delight in praises of their beauty. Or even lustfully, like prostitutes and adulteresses. On this it is said in Ecclesiasticus 25: 'The wickedness of a woman changes her face and darkens her countenance like a bear, and like a sack she shows herself in the midst of her neighbors.'11 She changes her face, it says, with ointments and varied adornment, so that —12 she may appear beautiful, though she is most shameful — just like Jezebel, who painted her eyes with care, as it is read in 4 Kings 9.13 Hence it is also said that she blinds her countenance in the manner of a bear, because she wears a veil over her nose by which she covers the shamefulness of her own face — just as a bear has a broad strap over its nose — and like a sack she shows herself in the midst of her neighbors, because with the veil and her other ornaments she so covers her body that nothing of her is visible, but she is like a sack filled with precious merchandise, according to that poetic saying:14 We're taken in by outward show — everything draped in gold and jewels — and the girl herself is the least part of who she is.15

Holy Women Who Adorned Themselves Inwardly

Holy women like Sarah, Judith, and Esther adorned themselves inwardly with virtue and used outward adornment only with moderation and sincere intention, subject to their husbands.

But a sack is better than those goods — even one truly full of ashes and dung — according to that passage in 2 Maccabees: 'Its glory is dung and worms; it's exalted today and tomorrow it won't be found.' On the other hand, holy women of former times who placed their hope in God adorned themselves inwardly and were subject to their own husbands, as we read in 1 Peter 3.✦ But even if some women did adorn and compose themselves outwardly, they did so with moderation and a sincere intention, as we read about Judith in chapter 10 of her book. She adorned herself with all her ornaments, and the Lord also granted her splendor — because all such adornment was rooted not in lust but in virtue. For this reason the Lord increased this beauty in her, so that she would appear with incomparable grace in the eyes of all. We also read in Esther that when she was to be brought into the royal bedchamber, she did not seek out feminine finery but accepted from the common supply whatever she wanted for her adornment.✦ She was indeed very beautiful, and with her extraordinary loveliness she appeared graceful and lovable to everyone's eyes. Valerius Maximus also relates in Book 6, in the chapter on Sulpicius Gallus, that Gallus divorced his wife because he discovered her outdoors with her head uncovered.

Household Governance and the Fourth Duty

The final duties are governing the household with prudence, educating children, disciplining servants, and managing domestic affairs sensibly, as the Apostle teaches Titus.

The law, after all, lays down for you only my eyes—the eyes by which you are to approve your beauty. With these instruments of adornment, prepare yourself; in these be beautiful; entrust yourself to the more certain knowledge of these; and let any further glimpse of yourself, through needless provocation, give rise to suspicion and accusation, and cling to you—this is unavoidable. These things are from Valerius. That is how Esther, noble in mind though she was, conducted herself: because of her husband the king and her own position's dignity, she necessarily wore the crown and royal ornaments, yet she used to say, as we read in Esther 13, 'You know, Lord, my need: that I detest the sign of my pride and glory that is on my head in the days of my display, and I loathe it like a menstrual cloth, and do not wear it in the days of my privacy.' These remarks concern love for a husband. The third point is to govern the household, namely— that, as the apostle teaches Titus according to God, she love and educate sons and daughters, and have disciplined male and female servants, and tolerate nothing disorderly or immodest among them. Whence Jerome says to Salvinia, 'Let no hairdresser walk beside you as your attendant, no actor playing a woman broken down, nothing of old women's tricks, nothing soft in your personal attentions toward you.' The fourth duty is to govern the household, following the Apostle's instruction to Titus: 'Remind them to be sensible, to care for their homes' — that is, to manage and distribute domestic affairs with prudence.✦1617

Read the original Latin

Deinde uero in recessu a parentibus, ut habitet cum uiro, admonenda est ab illis, sicut legitur de sara, de qua in eodem x: ‘Apprehendentes filiam suam parentes osculati sunt eam et dimiserunt ire cum uiro, monentes illam honorare soceros, diligere maritum, regere familiam, gubernare domum et seipsam irreprehensibilem exhibere.’ Ecce admoniciones quinque. prima est soceros honorare quod est humilitatis et paciencie. Nam, ut in echira scribit therencius et recitat etiam Jeronimus, uno animo ‘omnes socrus oderunt nurus.’ Dicitur et in ecclesias tico xxxvii: ‘Noli consiliari cum socero tuo.’ Illos igitur honorare qui solent odiosi ac molesti et graues esse, non est sine uirtute paciencie. Secunda est maritum diligere, de quo etiam precipit apostolus ad tytum iio: ‘Adolescentulas,’ inquit, ‘hortare, ut uiros suos ament.’ Cuius sc.

amoris coniugalis iiiior signa debet ostendere. Primum est, ut ei uoluntarie se subiciat, iuxta preceptum domini quod habetur in genesi iii: ‘Sub uiri potestate eris et ipse dominabitur tui.’ Subiciat, inquam, se uiro tripliciter, sc. ei debitum reddendo, ipsum timendo et ei seruiendo. De primo dicit apostolus Ia ad cor. vii: ‘Uxori uir debitum reddat. Similiter autem et uxor uiro. Nam mulier sui corporis potestatem non habet sed uir.’

De secundo dicitur ad ephes. v: ‘uxor timeat uirum suum.’ de tercio dicit augustinus quod ‘subditas et pene famulas lex esse uoluit uxores.’ Hinc etiam Jeronimus contra eluidium: ‘Nunciatur,’ inquit, ‘uir uenire cum sociis et ecce uxor ad yrundinis modum uniuersa penetralia lustrat, si thorus rigeat, si uerrunt pauimenta, si ordinata sint pocula, si prandium paratum.’ Sic, ut dicit petrus in Ia iii, ‘sara obediebat abrahe dominum eum uocans.’ Secundum est, ut sollicita sit de uiro, qualiter ei placeat, iuxta illud apostoli Ia ad corinth. vii: ‘Mulier nupta cogitat, quomodo placeat uiro.’ debet autem ei placere propter duo, uidel.

ut ab ipso diligatur et ut ipse a fornicacione uel adulterio retrahatur. Tercium est, ut eius infirmitates ac defectus pacienter et amabiliter sustineat, sicut ylia fecit, de qua sic Jeronimus contra iouinianum libro i enarrat: ‘Duellus,’ inquit, ‘qui primus rome nauali certamine triumphauit, yliam uirginem uxorem duxit que tante pudicicie erat, ut illo quoque seculo pro exemplo fuerit quo impudicia non uicium sed monstrum,’ id est spectaculum, ‘erat. Is ergo iam senex ac trementi corpore in quodam iurgio sibi os fetidum exprobrari audiuit et tristis se domum contulit. Cumque apud uxorem questus esset, cur se nunquam, ut huic uicio mederetur, admonuisset, “hoc,” inquit ilia, “fecissem, nisi omnibus uiris sic os olere putassem.” ’ Hec Jeronimus. Et addit: ‘laudanda est in utroque pudica et nobilis femina, et si uiri sui uicium ignorauit et si pacienter tulit et quod maritus infelicitatem corporis sui non uxoris fastidio, sed inimici maledicto sensit.’ Quartum est, ut ei corpus suum caste custodiat, iuxta illud apostoli ad tytum ii: ‘Hortare adolescentulas esse castas.’ Et hoc non castitate coacta, sed uoluntaria.

Quedam enim caste sunt, quia non rogantur uel quia luxuriandi facultas eis terrore subtrahitur. de primo dicit ouidius in libro de remediis:

Casta est quam nemo rogauit.

De secundo dicit tibullius:

Ne seuo sis casta metu, sed mente fideli.

Item ouidius sine tytulo libro iiio:

Si qua metu dempto casta est, ea denique casta est: Que, quia non liceat, non facit, illa facit. ut bene seruetur iam corpus, adultera mens est: Nec custodiri, ni uelit, ipsa potest. Nec mentem seruare potes, licet omnia claudas. Omnibus exclusis intus adulter eris.

Hec ille. refert Jeronimus contra iouinianum libro io, quod ‘lucij sille felicis, si non habuisset uxorem, metella coniunx palam impudica erat. Et quia nouissima mala nostra discimus, id athenis cantabatur et sylla ignorabat, secretaque domus sue primum hostium conuicio didicit.’ hinc etiam marcialis cocus scribit:

Predia solus habes et solus, candide, nummos . . . Et cor solus habes, solus et ingenium. Omnia solus habes; hoc te puto nolle negare, uxorem sed habes, candide, cum populo.

ut autem uxor pudica fidem sue castitatis omnibus faciat, grauitatem in moribus teneat et pudicam societatem habeat. Nam de primo sic de quadam loquitur ouidius in libro metamorphoseos vii:

faciesque etasque iubebant credere adulterium, prohibebant credere mores.

De secundo dicit tibullius:

Casta precor coniunx maneas sanctique pudoris assideat custos sedula semper anus.

Hec de signis amoris coniugalis in uxore. Ceterum amor ipse uxoris in uirum debet esse pudicus, que sc. amoris pudicia consistit in tribus, videl. ut eum caste quasi sponsum, non quasi adulterum diligat et ut zelotypiam abiciat et ut nec propter eius placenciam faciem depingat uel crines proprios inficiat uel alienos inserat. De primo dicit Jeronimus contra Jouinianum, quod ‘matrimonia quorumdam adulteriis coheserunt.’ unde idem exponens illud uerbum apostoli ad tytum, adolescentulas hortare, ut uiros ament, ‘uult,’ inquit, ‘uxorem ad uirum pudicam habere dilectionem, ut cum pudore ac uerecundia et quasi necessitate sexus uiro pocius debitum reddat quam ipsa ab eo exigat et opera liberorum ante dei oculos et angelorum perpetrare se credat, ut eciam secretum cubile ac noctis tenebras et clausum cubiculum erubescat, dum omnia patere dei oculis cogitat.’ Hec Jeronimus. De secundo dicitur in ecclesiastico xxvi: ‘A tribus timuit cor meum et in quarto facies mea metuit: Delaturam,’ id est prodicionem, ‘ciuitatis et collectionem populi,’ id est coniuracionem, ‘et calumpniam mendacem.’

Quod hec tria sint grauia, ostenditur, cum subiungitur: ‘Super mortem hec omnia grauia,’ quia sc. melior est mors quam uita amara, ut legitur ibidem xxx. Deinde subiungitur quartum, quod est grauissimum, hoc modo: ‘Dolor cordis est et luctus,’ suple causaliter, ‘mulier zelotypa,’ id est suspiciosa sc. actiue uel passiue. Hoc est que male de uiro suspicatur uel de qua uir merito male suspicatur. Cum tali namque non potest pacem uel requiem habere, meliusque est mori quam cum ea uiuere, iuxta illud in ecclesiaste vii: ‘Inueni amariorem morte mulierem.’ Deinde causa huius grauitatis exprimitur, cum subditur: ‘In muliere zelotipa est flagellum lingue omnibus conmunicans,’ id est nulli a detractione uel contumelia parcens, de quo sc. flagello dicitur uiro sancto et quieto in iob v: ‘A flagello lingue absconderis.’

De tercio dicit ambrosius, eiusque uerba recitat etiam augustinus in libro de doctrina christiana iii, dicens: ‘Hinc,’ ait, ‘illa nascuntur incentiua uiciorum, ut quesitis coloribus ora depingant, dum uiris displicere formidant et de adulterio uultus meditantur adulterium castitatis. Quanta hec amencia effigiem mutare nature, picturam querere, et dum uerentur maritale iudicium, perdidere suum. Prior enim de se pronunciat, quoniam cupit mutare quod nata est. Ita dum alij placere studet, prius ipsa sibi displicet. Quem iudicem, o mulier, ueriorem requirimus deformitatis tue quam te ipsam, que times videri. Nam si pulchra es, quid absconderis? Si deformis, cur te formosam esse mentiris, nec tue consciencie, nec alieni graciam habitura erroris? .

. . Indignaris, si amet aliam quam te, qui adulterare docetur a te . . . Denique tollerabiliora propemodum in adulterio sunt crimina, quoniam ibi adulteratur pudicicia, hic natura.’ Hec ambrosius. Item ad idem cyprianus in libro de disciplina et habitu uirginum: ‘ut,’ inquit, ‘ .

. . incesta fucis lenocenantibus non sis, corruptis et violatis que dei sunt, peior adultera detineris. Quod enim te putas ornari, quod comi, impugnacio est ista diuini operis, preuaricacio ueritatis . . . Non metuis, oro te, que talis es, ne cum resurrectionis dies uenerit, artifex tuus te non recognoscat, sed ad sua premia . .

. uenientem . . . excludat uigore censoris et iudicis increpans et dicens: “Opus hoc meum non est, nec ymago hec nostra est . . . figura corrupta est, uultus alienus est.”

Deum videre non poteris, cum oculi tibi non sint quos deus fecit, sed quos dyabolus infecit. Illum tu sectata es, rutilos atque depictos oculos serpentis imitata es, de inimico tuo compta, cum illo pariter et arsura.’ Hec cyprianus. Quedam eciam grauius peccant, que non studio placendi uiris, sed obtentu placendi eis faciem et crinem depingunt et adulterant uel desiderio inanis glorie, iuxta illud ouidij in libro de arte:

Delectant eciam castas preconia forme

vel etiam libidinose sicut meretrices et adultere. De quali dicitur in ecclesiastico xxv: ‘Nequicia mulieris immutat faciem suam et obcecat uultum suum tanquam ursus et quasi saccum ostendit in medio proximorum.’ Immutat, inquit, faciem suam unguentis et cultu uario, ut sc. uideatur decora, cum sit turpissima, sicut et iezabel que depinxit oculos suos studio, sicut legitur IIII Regum ix. unde et dicitur in modum ursi obcecare uultum suum, quia super nasum gerit peplum, quo tegit faciei sue turpitudinem, sicut et ursus habet super nasum corrigiam latam et quasi saccum se ostendit in medio proximorum, quia peplo ac ceteris ornamentis ita tegit corpus suum, ut nichil appareat ipsius, sed sit quasi saccus preciosis mercibus plenus, iuxta illud poeticum:

Decipimur cultu, gemmis auroque teguntur omnia, pars minima est ipsa puella sui.

Sed melior est ipsis mercibus saccus, cum reuera luta sit ac fecibus plenus, iuxta illud Io machabeorum iio: ‘Gloria eius stercus ac uermis est, hodie extollitur et cras non inuenietur.’ Aliter uero quondam sancte mulieres in deo sperantes interius ornabant se propriis uiris subiecte, sicut legitur in prima petri iiio. Sed et si alique exterius ornabant se et conponebant, hoc faciebant moderate ac sincera intencione, sicut legitur de iudith in libro suo x, videl. quod omnibus ornamentis suis ornauit se, cui et dominus splendorem contulit, quoniam omnis hec conposicio non ex libidine sed ex uirtute pendebat. Ideoque dominus hanc in illa pulcritudinem ampliauit, ut inconparabili decore omnium oculis appareret. Legitur eciam in hester, quod ipsa ad cubile regium introducenda muliebrem cultum non quesiuit, sed que voluit, ab egeo ad ornatum accepit. Erat enim formosa valde et incredibili pulcritudine omnium oculis graciosa et amabilis uidebatur. Refert autem valerius libro vi de sulpicio gallo, quod ‘uxorem suam dimisit eo quod illam operto capite foris versatam cognouit.

“lex enim,” inquit, “tibi meos tantum prescribit oculos quibus formam tuam approbes. Hiis instrumenta decoris prepara, hiis esto speciosa, horum te cerciori crede noticie, ulterior tui conspectus irritacione superuacua accersitus in suspicione et crimine hereat, necesse est.” ’ Hec valerius. Sic faciebat illa mente nobilis regina hester que propter regis et status sui dignitatem necessario dyadema et regia ornamenta portabat et tamen dicebat, ut legitur in hester xiii: ‘Tu scis, domine, necessitatem meam quod abhominer signum superbie et glorie mee quod est super caput meum in diebus ostentacionis mee et detester illud quasi pannum menstruate et non portem in diebus silencij mei.’ Hec de mariti amore. Tercium est familiam regere, sc. ut filios et filias, sicut docet apostolus ad tytum, secundum deum diligat et erudiat, famulos et ancillas disciplinatas habeat, nec aliquid inordinatum uel impudicum in eis sustineat. unde Jeronimus ad saluiniam, ‘Non ambulet,’ inquit, ‘iuxta te procurator calamistratus, non hystrio in feminam fractus, nichilque senicarum arcium, nichil in obsequiis tibi molle iungatur.’

Quartum est domum gubernare, iuxta illud apostoli ad tytum iio: ‘Admone illas esse prudentes, domus curam habentes,’ id est res domesticas prudenter administrantes ac dispensantes.

Scripture echoes

  1. ↩Titus.2.4 — so that they may train the young women to be lovers of their husbands, lovers of their children
  2. ↩Gen.3.16 — To the woman he said, "I will greatly multiply your pain and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children, and your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you."
  3. ↩1Cor.7.3-1Cor.7.4 — The husband should give to his wife her due, and likewise the wife to her husband. 1Cor.7.4 — The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
  4. ↩1Cor.7.4 — The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
  5. ↩1Cor.7.4 — The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
  6. ↩Titus.2.4-Titus.2.5 — so that they may train the young women to be lovers of their husbands, lovers of their children Titus.2.5 — to be self-controlled, pure, workers at home, good, and subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be reviled.
  7. ↩1Pet.3.1-1Pet.3.6 — In the same way, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 1Pet.3.2 — when they observe your pure conduct carried out in reverence 1Pet.3.3 — Let it not be the outward adorning of braiding of hair, and wearing of gold, or putting on of clothing, 1Pet.3.4 — but the hidden person of the heart, in the imperishable garment of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 1Pet.3.5 — For in this way the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, being subject to their own husbands. 1Pet.3.6 — just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose children you have become, doing good and not fearing any intimidation.
  8. ↩Esth.2.15 — And when the turn came for Esther, daughter of Abihail the uncle of Mordecai, who had taken her as his own daughter, to go in to the king, she asked for nothing except what Hegai the king's eunuch, keeper of the women, advised. And Esther found favor in the eyes of all who saw her.
  9. ↩Titus.2.4-Titus.2.5 — so that they may train the young women to be lovers of their husbands, lovers of their children Titus.2.5 — to be self-controlled, pure, workers at home, good, and subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be reviled.

Notes

  1. 1 ↩The simile 'ad yrundinis modum' (after the manner of a swallow) evokes the bird's restless, darting flight — suggesting the wife's anxious, thorough inspection of the household.
  2. 2 ↩Monstrum is rendered 'spectacle' with the gloss id est spectaculum supplied in the source; the parenthetical equates the two terms.
  3. 3 ↩fides rendered as 'proof' (pledge/evidence of chastity) rather than 'faith'; societas pudica rendered as 'chaste companions' (chaste companionship/association).
  4. 4 ↩de primo ambiguous: 'of the first woman' (primus substantivized as feminine) is the most plausible reading given the Ovid reference; alternative 'in the first place' less likely.
  5. 5 ↩The numeral 'xxx' is uncertain in the source; it may refer to a chapter or section number in the deuterocanonical text. Rendered as 'chapter 30' following the candidate gloss, but the reference is unclear.
  6. 6 ↩'suple causaliter' is a scholastic gloss instructing the reader to supply 'caused by' before 'a jealous woman.' The translation makes this implicit instruction explicit.
  7. 7 ↩The scholastic distinction 'actiue uel passiue' specifies that jealousy can be active (the wife suspects her husband) or passive (the husband rightly suspects his wife).
  8. 8 ↩The quotation 'Inueni amariorem morte mulierem' is attributed to Ecclesiastes 7 (ecclesiaste vii), but this wording aligns more closely with deuterocanonical tradition (Sirach/Ecclesiasticus) than with the Hebrew Ecclesiastes. The source attribution may reflect a Vulgate chapter numbering difference or a conflation with Sirach 25:15–16.
  9. 9 ↩'omnibus conmunicans' is rendered 'communicating to all' in the sense of spreading slander indiscriminately to everyone.
  10. 10 ↩The quotation 'A flagello lingue absconderis' is attributed to Job 5. The exact Vulgate wording and verse correspondence should be verified, as this may reflect a paraphrase or a variant reading.
  11. 11 ↩Quotation from Ecclesiasticus (Sirach) 25, a deuterocanonical book absent from the Moses canon; preserved without quotation-mark resolution per deuterocanonical policy.
  12. 12 ↩The abbreviation 'sc' (scilicet) is expanded in the normalized text; rendered here as 'so that' to preserve the explanatory force of the clause as it leads into the following sentence.
  13. 13 ↩Reference to 4 Kings 9 (Vulgate numbering), corresponding to 2 Kings 9 in most modern canons. The allusion to Jezebel painting her eyes is drawn from the narrative tradition surrounding her death.
  14. 14 ↩The passage extends the Ecclesiasticus metaphor of the bear and the sack with an allegorical explanation of how a woman uses veiling and ornamentation to conceal her true appearance. The 'poetic saying' (illud poeticum) at the end is not further identified in the supplied text.
  15. 15 ↩The Latin plays on the idea that all the adornment (cultu, gemmis, auro) hides the person: 'teguntur omnia' (all things are covered over), while 'pars minima est ipsa puella sui' means the girl herself is the least part of herself — her true self is buried beneath the ornament. The connective -que on auroque is additive ('and with gold'), but the overall rhetorical force is adversative: all this gold and jewelry only conceals.
  16. 16 ↩The embedded quotation ('Admone illas esse prudentes, domus curam habentes') is drawn from Titus 2:4–5, where Paul instructs Titus to exhort younger women to be sensible and manage their households. Final Moses resolution pending.
  17. 17 ↩Gubernare rendered as 'govern' in the sense of household management; dispensantes rendered as 'distribute' to capture the stewardship sense of dispensing resources.

De eruditione filiorum nobilium (On the Education of Noble Children) companion

Formation starts with the parents' own practice

Model a daily devotional habit your children can see — Chosen Portion makes it a free 10-minute routine.

Vincent taught that children are formed by the daily practices of their household; Chosen Portion gives parents the daily devotional practice that anchors that household rhythm.

  • A short daily devotional you can read before the kids wake up
  • Family-friendly portions from the same historic tradition Vincent drew on
  • Build a visible 30-day habit your children can imitate
Chosen Portion — Daily Prayer (free iOS app) →