Come possa conoscersi se l'uomo opera con la diffidenza di sé e con la confidenza in Dio
The Mirror of Our Failures
Our reaction to falling reveals whether we truly rely on ourselves or on God.
Sometimes, a presumptuous servant thinks he has achieved a distrust of himself and a confidence in God, but that isn't the case. The effect your fall has on you will make this clear.
Distinguishing True Trust from Self-Reliance
True trust in God is marked by peace and renewed resolve after a fall, whereas self-reliance leads to despair and anxiety.
If you, then, when you fall, feel anxious, sad, and find yourself drawn to a certain despair about being able to move forward and do good, it's a sure sign that you were relying on yourself and not on God. If your sadness and despair are intense, it shows you relied heavily on yourself and little on God. In fact, someone who truly distrusts himself and trusts in God isn't surprised when he falls; he doesn't feel sad or regretful, knowing that this happens because of his own weakness and lack of trust in God. Rather, he distrusts himself more, and humbly trusts in God even more; and having a strong aversion to every defect and disordered passion, which are the cause of his fall, with great, calm, and peaceful sorrow for the offense against God, he then pursues the endeavor and chases his enemies to death with greater courage and resolve.
The False Peace of the Self-Centered
Many who call themselves spiritual are actually driven by self-love when they seek relief from the anxiety of their own failures.
I wish these things would be carefully considered by certain people who call themselves spiritual. When they have fallen into some fault, they can't find peace; and sometimes, more to free themselves from the anxiety and restlessness caused by self-love than for any other reason, they can't wait to go see their spiritual father, from whom they should primarily seek to cleanse themselves of the stain of sin and gain strength against it through the most holy Sacrament of the Eucharist.
Read the original Latin
Alle volte pare assai al servo presuntuoso d'aver ottenuto la diffidenza di sé e la confidenza in Dio, ma non sarà così. E di ciò ti darà chiarezza l'effetto che produrrà in te la caduta.
Se tu dunque, quando cadi, t'inquieti, ti rattristi e ti senti chiamare a un certo che di disperazione di poter andare più innanzi e di far bene, è segno certo che tu confidavi in te e non in Dio. E se molta sarà la tristezza e la disperazione, molto tu confidavi in te e poco in Dio: infatti colui che in gran parte diffida di se stesso e confida in Dio, quando cade non si meraviglia, non si rattrista né si rammarica conoscendo che ciò gli capita per sua debolezza e poca confidenza in Dio. Anzi più diffida di sé, assai più umilmente confida in Dio; e avendo in odio sopra ogni cosa il difetto e le passioni disordinate, causa della caduta, con un dolore grande, quieto e pacifico per l'offesa di Dio, segue poi l'impresa e perseguita i suoi nemici fino alla morte con maggior animo e risoluzione.
Queste cose vorrei che fossero ben considerate da certe persone che si dicono spirituali. Quando esse sono incorse in qualche difetto, non possono né vogliono darsi pace; e alle volte, più per liberarsi dall'ansietà e dall'inquietudine dovute all'amor proprio che per altro, non vedono l'ora di andare a trovare il padre spirituale, dal quale dovrebbero andare principalmente per lavarsi dalla macchia del peccato e prendere forza contro di esso con il santissimo sacramento dell'eucaristia.
Spiritual Combat companion
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