Al dampnyd soule be dispisid in the syte of God, as the devil; and these Revelations withdraw not the feith of Holy Church, but comfortith; and the more we besy to know Gods privites, the less we knowen. Thirty-third chapter.
Desire for Hidden Knowledge
Julian confesses her longing to see hell and purgatory, but affirms her steadfast faith in the Church's teaching and accepts that her desire was not fulfilled except for the vision of the devil's reprobation.
And yet in this I desired, as far as I dared, to have a full sight of Hell and Purgatory. But it was not my intention to test anything that belongs to the faith.1 For I believed firmly that Hell and Purgatory exist for the same purpose that Holy Church teaches. But my intention was that I might see, for the sake of learning, everything that pertains to my faith, so that I might live more for God's worship and for my own good.2 And regarding my desire, I got nothing of this at all, except what was said before in the fifth showing, where I saw that the devil is rebuked by God and eternally damned. In that vision I understood that of all creatures who are of the devil's condition in this life and die in it, no more mention is made before God and all His holy ones than of the devil—even though they are human, whether baptized or not.3
Faith and God's Will
Julian explains that the revelations did not lead her away from Church teaching, and she concludes that we should trust in God's deeds, avoid seeking His secrets, and rest content in His will like the saints.
For though the revelation was of goodness, and little mention was made of evil in it, yet I wasn't drawn by that from any point of the faith that Holy Church teaches me to believe. For I had sight of Christ's Passion in various showings—in the first, the second, the fifth, and the eighth, as was said before—where I had in part a feeling of the sorrow of our Lady and of His true friends who saw Him in pain. But I didn't see so distinctly specified the Jews who put Him to death; even so, I knew in my faith that they were cursed and damned without end, except those who convert by grace.4 And I was strengthened and taught in a general way to keep myself in the faith in every point, and in everything as I had understood before, hoping that I stood in it with the mercy and the grace of God, and desiring and praying in my intention that I might continue in it to the end of my life. And it's God's will that we have great regard for all His deeds that He has done, but we always need to leave off looking ahead at what the deed will be; and let us desire to be like our brethren who are saints in Heaven, who will nothing but God's will.5 Then we will rejoice only in God, and be well content both with hiding and with showing. For I saw truly in our Lord's meaning that the more we busy ourselves to know His secrets in this or any other thing, the farther we will be from knowing them.
Read the original Middle English
And yet in this I desired as I durst that I myte have had ful syte of Helle and Purgatory. But it was not my mening to maken prefe of anythyng that longyth to the feith. For I levyd sothfastly that Hel and Purgatory is for the same end that Holy Church techith. But my menyng was that I myte have seen for leryng in al thyng that longyth to my feith, wherby I myte liven the more to Gods worship, and to my profit. And for my desire I coude of this ryte nowte, but as it is aforseid in the fifth shewing, wher that I saw that the devil is reprovid of God and endlesly dampned. In which syte I understode that al creatures that arn of the devils condition in this life, and therin enden, there is no more mention made of hem aforn God and al His holy than of the devil, notwithstondying that thei be of mankynd, whether they have be cristenyd or not.
For thow the Revelation was made of goodnes, in which was made litil mention of evil, yet I was not drawne therby from any poynt of the feith that Holy Church techyth me to levyn. For I had syte of the passion of Criste in dyvers shewyngs, in the first, in the second, in the fifth, and in the eighth, as it is seid aforn, wheras I had in party a felyng of the sorow of our Lady and of His trew freinds that sen Hym in peyne. But I saw not so propirly specyfyed the Jewes that deden Hym to ded, notwithstondyn I knew in my feith that thei wer accursid and dampnyd without end, savyng those that converten be grace. And I was strengthyd and lered generaly to kepe me in the feith in every pointe, and in al as I had afore understoden, hopyng that I was therin with the mercy and the grace of God, desyring and prayng in my menyng that I myte continue therin on to my lifs end. And it is Gods will that we have gret regard to al His dedes that He hath don, but evermore it us nedyth levyn the beholdyng what the dede shal be; and desir we to be leke our brethren which be seynts in Hevyn that wille ryth nowte but God wille. Than shal we only enjoyen in God, and ben wel payd both with hyding and with shewyng. For I saw sothly in our Lordis menyng, the more we besyn us to knowen His privities in this or any other thyng, the ferther shal we be from the knowing thereof.
Notes
- 1 ↩maken prefe: rendered as 'put to the proof' (seek confirmatory evidence); not 'make a legal proof' or 'boast'.
- 2 ↩profit: spiritual benefit/good, not material gain; rendered 'my own good'.
- 3 ↩al His holy: rendered 'all His holy ones' (saints/holy company), not abstract holiness.
- 4 ↩Julian distinguishes what she saw in the showings from what she held by the Church's faith: those who put Christ to death are, in that faith-frame, under endless curse, saving converts by grace. Rendered as her stated sense, not as a present doctrinal recommendation.
- 5 ↩levyn here means leave/cease (leave off the beholding), not believe; contrast s1 techyth me to levyn = teach me to believe.
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