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Chapter 94Ansl.1.94

MEDITATIO XVIII. Gratiarum actiones pro beneficiis divinae misericordiae et petitio divini adjutorii.

A Litany of Christ's Names

The soul addresses Christ with a sweeping litany of devotional titles, confessing Him as the source of every spiritual good.

You are my living God, my holy Christ, my merciful Lord, my great king, my good shepherd, my truthful teacher, my timely helper, my most beautiful beloved, my living bread, my priest forever, my guide to the homeland, my true light, my holy sweetness, my upright life, my excellent wisdom, my pure simplicity, my peaceful harmony, my secure guard, my good portion, my everlasting salvation, my great mercy, my strongest patience, my spotless victim, my holy redemption, my firm hope, my perfect love, my holy resurrection, my eternal life, my joy and my most blessed life, lasting without end.✦✦✦✦

Thanksgiving for Baptism and Growth in Faith

The meditant gives thanks for Christian birth, baptismal grace, adoption, and the gift of right faith, and petitions for its increase.

I beseech you, I plead with you, and I pray that you bring to completion in me the work of your mercy you have begun: for I, the last of your servants, not forgetting the gifts of your compassion that have been bestowed on me a sinner, give you thanks, because in your sheer mercy you caused me, though unworthy, to be born of Christian parents, and through the water of holy Baptism and the renewal of the Holy Spirit you freed me from the bonds of original sin, and gathered me among your adopted children; because you gave me the right faith, and have deigned always to increase and strengthen it in my heart through the illumination of your grace, and through the teachings of holy mother Church; and I entreat you, Lord, and humbly ask that you always increase in me this faith — true faith, holy faith, catholic and orthodox, most wise and most invincible, adorned with all good and every virtue, a faith that works through love in me to please you; a faith that cannot be overcome amid the words of dispute in a time of persecution, or in the day of necessity and death.✦✦✦✦

Petition for the Virtues

The soul prays for an increase of faith, hope, love, humility, patience, chastity, the cardinal virtues, and discernment, that these may adorn a life of true service.

O God, source and origin of all virtues, their giver and preserver, increase in me, I pray, right faith, unshakable hope, perfect love, deep humility, most invincible patience, and perpetual chastity of body and soul. Give me prudence, justice, fortitude, and temperance, discernment in all things, and a watchful mind, so that I may prudently distinguish between good and evil, between the right way and the left.✦ Make me, then, rich in holy virtues, so that through them I may serve you and through them please you in truth: for I have become a lover of their beauty through your grace. Give me these virtues for the honor and glory of your name; join them to my faith, so that they may be its inseparable companions throughout my whole life. And so, I ask: make me, through your grace, always steadfast in faith and effective in every work, so that the faith my tongue speaks and my hand commits to writing may be affirmed by a credible life and good conduct.

Thanks for the Gift of Pastoral Ministry

The meditant thanks God for knowledge and humble understanding, prays for fitting eloquence and pastoral fitness, and confesses confidence that God works great things through the small.

I give you thanks, Lord, because you've filled me — an empty vessel, an unlearned nobody — with knowledge and understanding, and have always given me a humble knowledge that builds up.1 Give me both a most gentle and a wise eloquence, one that refuses to be puffed up and refuses to boast about your gifts over the brothers. Place, I beg you, in my mouth a word of consolation and of building up and of exhortation through your Holy Spirit, so that I may be able both to urge on the good toward better things and to call back those who walk off course to the line of your uprightness, by word and by example. Let the words you give your servant be like the sharpest darts and burning arrows, that they may pierce and set aflame the minds of those who hear them, with reverence for you and love of you. You are the shepherd and ruler of all, Christ my God — and it was not by any merits of mine, but by the sheer condescension of your mercy, that you called my littleness to this pastoral office. For your sake and for your name, make me fit for this ministry, so that I may wisely govern your household and in all things be able to feed your flock according to your will. Grant, by your devotion and goodness, that I may become in your house a burning and shining lamp; grant, for the honor and glory of your name, that with much good fruit from the fellowship of the brothers I may deserve to reach your glory. For nothing is difficult for you, nothing impossible.2 Your will is what I long to do; your will is the work itself. And so I believe with my heart and confess with my mouth that you can and will bring that work to magnificent fulfillment through one as small as me. I know, and I am certain, that you are able to produce good and great fruits from your flock through one as slight and weak as I am.

Despair of Self, Refuge in Mercy

The soul confesses utter inadequacy for the pastoral charge and finds breath only in God's mercy.

I am very small, a person of no strength at all, with nothing in me that's of any use or worthy of so great a duty; and so, utterly despairing of my own insignificance, I find breath only in your mercy alone.

God's Glory in the Small and Weak

The meditant reflects that God works most gloriously in the small, prays for angelic aid and material provision for the flock, and acknowledges that every good gift comes from God alone.

But even though you are great in great things, you work great things in small ones still more gloriously. Your praise will surely be sweeter and more abundant on people's lips, since through me — so small a thing — you will have been found worthy to work great things from your flock.3 Send, therefore, your holy angel from heaven to my aid — one who, helping me in all things, may cause this work to prosper through my hand — so that your blessed name may be glorified in me, a wretched sinner. Rich in mercy, generous in gifts, who grant all things to all and lose nothing — give me heavenly and earthly resources for every need, so that I may have the means to feed and sustain your flock, both spiritually and bodily, and to receive without hesitation all who come in your name, and at the same time to arrange and prepare the places entrusted to me for the rest and salvation of the brothers, as is fitting and right. All this I ask of you, Lord our God, because every good thing we have is your gift.✦ For we can neither serve you nor please you except from what you yourself have given.

The Burden of Office and Plea for Release or Perseverance

The soul, overwhelmed by the weight of pastoral responsibility, humbly asks either for release or for divine consolation and perseverance.

But if it's not perhaps in the plan of your eternal will for me to bear good and great fruit from your sheep, I beg and humbly ask you to release me from the bond of so great a responsibility, in whatever way seems right to you, on whatever day you choose. You know all things, and you can do all things. What am I doing here? Why do I linger in these troubles, if through your grace I'm not going to accomplish anything good for the salvation of the brothers? I ask you for two things: don't refuse me one of them, in your mercy. I ask you through all your mercies: give me your heavenly consolation in my many tribulations. This weight laid on my shoulders is more than I can bear, and I'm afraid to set it down: distress presses in on every side, and I don't know which way to turn. God, helper of all who hope in you — may your devotion not abandon me, may your grace not forsake me.

Hope Anchored in God's Mercy

The meditant confesses trust in God's mercy alone, recalls that none who hope in the Lord are abandoned, and prays for the manifestation of that mercy.

God, help me as I place my hope in you and trust in your mercy alone, because without you I can't please you. Who has ever hoped in you and been abandoned?✦ It has not been heard of since the beginning of the world. God, you are the best — of infinite goodness and boundless mercy — and you have never been known to abandon those who hope in you. Show your mercy to me, I beg you, because I have fled to you — so that those who hate me may see it and be put to shame; since you, Lord, have helped me and comforted me.✦

Thanksgiving for Vocation and Prayer for Detachment

The soul thanks God for calling it from the world's vanity to holy service, prays for rest and freedom from worldly entanglement, and supports this with multiple scriptural exhortations to detachment.

I give you thanks, Lord, because you have separated me from the vain fellowship of this world and led me to your holy service — not by any merit of my own, but solely by the gracious condescension of your mercy. I bless you, Lord our God, who grant me, though unworthy, to share in the fellowship and love of your servants. Grant me rest, health of body and soul, and a fitting freedom to be devoted to you. Free me from the most vain entanglements of this world, for the progress of my soul, for the honor and glory of your name; for it is written: No one serving as a soldier to God entangles himself in worldly affairs. And you separate the souls of those who serve you from all the turmoils of care, so that they may be free for you alone, Lord, day and night. Grant fruitful and spiritual leisure to those who have renounced the world, so that by the very palate of the heart they may taste and perceive how sweet and pleasant you are, Lord — just as your Scripture admonishes, saying: Be still, and know that I am God.✦✦ And elsewhere: Learn wisdom in a time of abundance, and the one who is diminished by busyness will himself come to grasp it. But your most sacred teaching, spoken from your holy mouth, instructs us more fully and altogether forbids us worldly cares, saying: You cannot serve God and mammon.✦ And again: No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of heaven.✦ And elsewhere you deign to draw us back by a clear example, saying: Remember Lot's wife.✦

Thanksgiving for Divine Patience and Petition for Repentance

The meditant thanks God for patient forbearance through a life of sin, prays for fruitful repentance in past, present, and future, and begs for the grace of tears and the opening of the heart's eyes.

I give you thanks, most merciful Lord, who from the beginning, from my very cradle, as I ran headlong through nearly every vice and sin, have still been kindly and patiently waiting for me—wretched, greatly negligent sinner that I am—to turn to repentance, not wanting to destroy me along with my sins, vices, faults, and negligences. For if you had wanted to deal with me, Lord, according to my sins, the earth should long ago have swallowed me alive.✦ But I ask you, merciful Lord, do not let your waiting for me be empty—or, God forbid, fruitless. You who do not want the death of the sinner, grant me forgiveness for my past evils; for the present, grant me amendment; and for the future, continually bestow on me your watchfulness and protection.✦ Give me the room and the space to bear worthy fruits of repentance.✦ Open the eyes of my heart through your Holy Spirit, so that I may see and lament all my sins.✦ Lord, the time is favorable, and the days are of salvation.✦ Have mercy on me, Lord, and do not destroy me with my sins, do not reserve my evils to be punished in that future life, in those infernal torments, in that tremendous judgment of yours.

Prayer for a Holy Death and the Beatific Vision

The soul prays that its sins be loosed before death, asks for a contrite heart and the grace of tears, and longs to see God's face with joy at the moment of departure.

Because of your great mercy, break the chains of all my sins before I leave this life. Give me a contrite and humble heart; give me the grace of tears.✦4 Give light to my heart and strength to my body, so that I can see what needs to be done, and once I've seen it, grow strong enough to carry it out bravely, all the days of my life.5 Have mercy on me, Lord; have mercy on me.✦ Do not let this sinful soul — for which you deigned both to be born of the Virgin and to die on the cross — I beg you, do not let it be parted from this mortal body before you bring me to full and perfect repentance, and I lament every sin I have committed since my baptism, from my earliest infancy, whether knowingly or unknowingly, whether arrogantly or through negligence — so that on the day of my departure, with all my loved ones cleansed and my ways set right, I may see your sweetest and most beautiful face with joy and exultation, secure and rejoicing, because of your abundant mercy and goodness.67

Thanksgiving for Lifelong Providence and Protection

The meditant gives thanks for deliverance from countless dangers and sins, for God's paternal restraint, and for the divine wisdom that withheld either opportunity or will to sin.

I give you thanks again and again, almighty and merciful Christ, who have deigned to set my undeserved smallness free — for your sake and for your holy name — from many straits, tribulations, calamities, and infirmities; from many pits, snares, occasions of stumbling, and sins; from many ambushes of visible and invisible enemies; from many evils and most grave dangers, guiding my life wonderfully and mercifully between adversity and prosperity in such a way that neither did adversity cast me down, nor did prosperity lift me up.✦ You have placed your bridle on my jaws, and you have not abandoned me entirely to the hand of my own free will, caring for me with a father's devotion, and not allowing me to be tempted beyond what I will be able to endure.✦ Where there was opportunity to sin, at times there was no will to do so; and where there was the will, there was no opportunity.

Petition Against Ingratitude and for Preservation of God's Image

The soul thanks God for all benefits, prays not to be ungrateful, asks for protection of divine gifts, seeks to be drawn by God's bridle, and confesses unworthiness before the saints and penitents.

So let praise be yours, let blessing be yours, let thanksgiving be yours, Lord my God, for all your gifts, all you have given, and all the benefits you bestow and have always bestowed on my soul and body from the very cradle — by your goodness and loving kindness, though nothing in me has earned it, and despite my most grievous sins standing in the way. But I ask you, Lord — I ask — do not let me be ungrateful for such great benefits, or unworthy of so many acts of compassion. Let it not be permitted — not by me, not by the devil, not by the world, not by anything, not by any person — to overthrow your gifts within me, because everything is fragile that strives to oppose you. Set your bridle, I beg you, more and more firmly upon my jaws, and draw me after you like a tame animal — kicking back against none of your commands — but with a steady and measured gait, carrying you my Lord, and obeying your will in all things.✦ Rouse my sluggishness, Lord, with your goads, and make me seek your face with all my heart and all my strength, every day of my life.✦✦ Draw me to you — O you who are the strength of our salvation, God — by the bridle of your mighty grace, and do not let me wander astray by my own will, governed by my own judgment.✦ Do not let your image in me be darkened; for if it is kept safe by your gift, it is always excellent, noble, and radiant.✦✦ Have mercy on me, Lord, your most wretched and unworthy servant, because I am not like your many and manifold servants who served you most devotedly from the very cradle — nor like those who, after public shameful acts, repented and deserved to be devoted to you.✦✦

Humble Self-Examination and Final Committal

The meditant confesses uncertainty about its own motives, entrusts itself entirely to God's providence, and prays to be guided by the Holy Spirit in all things unto eternal life.

I am not like some Christian women married to men who serve you in acts of mercy with the deepest devotion. I am not like many of those who in the eyes of people seem to be wicked and perverse, but who are far otherwise in your sight: for you alone know the hearts of the children of men. Yet if I do, or shall do, any good, Lord, by your grace bestowed, I do not know with what purpose I do it, or by what reckoning it is weighed by you. Therefore — God, terrible in your plans over the human race — I, your suppliant, trembling greatly, beg your mercy: you who want no one to perish but all to be saved, do not abandon me into the power of my own counsel, or into the judgment of my own will, or into the power or temptation of demons, or into the wandering judgment or harmful counsel of others; but by your goodness and tender care, according to your own most kind providence — which cannot be deceived in its governing — order my life here and everywhere, now and always, according to your good pleasure, and guide my heart, my tongue, and my actions through your Holy Spirit, according to your will, in your mercy; with you as my ruler and my leader, may I always strive to think, speak, and do what pleases you, through your grace in truth, and at last lead me to eternal life — you, who are the giver of every good thing, God, blessed with the Father and the Holy Spirit, forever and ever.89 Amen.

Read the original Latin

Tu es Deus meus vivus, Christus meus sanctus, Dominus meus pius, rex meus magnus, pastor meus bonus, magister meus verax, adjutor meus opportunus, dilectus meus pulcherrimus, panis meus vivus, sacerdos meus in aeternum, dux meus ad patriam, lux mea verax, dulcedo mea sancta, vita mea recta, sapientia mea praeclara, simplicitas mea pura, concordia mea pacifica, custodia mea tuta, portio mea bona, salus mea sempiterna, misericordia mea magna, patientia mea robustissima, victima mea immaculata, redemptio mea sancta, spes mea firma, charitas mea perfecta, resurrectio mea sancta, vita mea aeterna, exsultatio et vita mea beatissima sine fine mansura. Te deprecor, supplico et oro ut perficias in me opus coeptum misericordiae tuae: ego enim, ultimus servorum tuorum, non immemor beneficiorum miserationis tuae, quae mihi peccatori collata sunt, gratias tibi ago, quia me indignum pro tua sola clementia ex Christianis parentibus nasci fecisti, et per aquam sancti baptismatis et renovationem sancti Spiritus ab originalibus vinculis expedisti, et in tuos adoptionis filios aggregasti; quoniam mihi rectam fidem donasti, eamque in corde meo semper augere et confirmare dignatus es per illuminationem gratiae tuae, et per documenta sanctae matris Ecclesiae; obsecroque te, Domine, et suppliciter rogo, adauge semper in me hanc fidem, fidem veram et fidem sanctam, catholicam et orthodoxam, fidem prudentissimam et invictissimam, bonis omnibus cunctisque virtutibus adornatam, quae per dilectionem operetur in me quod tibi placet; quae nequeat vinci inter verba altercationis in tempore persecutionis, vel in die necessitatis et mortis. Cunctarum fons et origo, largitor et conservator virtutum, Deus, auge, quaeso, in me fidem rectam, spem inconcussam, charitatem perfectam, humilitatem profundam, patientiam invictissimam, corporis et animae castitatem perpetuam. Da mihi prudentiam, justitiam, fortitudinem et temperantiam, discretionem in omnibus, et sensum pervigilem, ut possim inter bona et mala, inter dextram et sinistram prudenter discernere. Fac me ergo divitem sacrarum virtutum, ex quibus tibi serviam, per quas tibi in veritate placeam: amator enim factus sum pulchritudinis earum per gratiam tuam. Da mihi eas propter honorem et gloriam nominis tui; conjunge illas fidei meae, ut sint ei individuae comites per omne tempus vitae meae; unde, rogo, fac me per gratiam tuam semper et in fide stabilem, et in omni opere efficacem, ut fidem tuam, quam lingua mea loquitur et manu mea scripta testantur, probabilis vita bonis moribus fateatur.

Gratias tibi ago, Domine, quia me vas vacuum, et inutilem idiotam replesti scientia, intelligentia; et dedisti semper hamilem scientiam, quae aedificet. Da mihi et mitissimam et sapientem eloquentiam, quae nesciat inflari, et de tuis bonis super fratres extolli. Pone, quaeso, in ore meo verbum consolationis et aedificationis et exhortationis per Spiritum sanctum tuum, ut et bonos valeam ad meliora exhortari, et eos, qui adverse gradiuntur, ad tuae rectitudinis lineam revocare verbo et exemplo. Sint verba, quae dederis servo tuo tanquam acutissima jacula, et ardentes sagittae, quae penetrent et incendant mentes audientium ad timorem et amorem tuum. Tu pastor et rector omnium, Christe Deus, qui nullis meis meritis, sed sola dignatione misericordiae tuae, vocasti parvitatem meam ad hoc pastorale officium; propter te et nomen tuum fac me idoneum ad hoc ministerium, et sapienter domum tuam regam, et in omnibus secundum voluntatem tuam gregem tuum pascere valeam. Tribue pro pietate et bonitate tua, ut efficiar in domo tua lucerna ardens et lucens; concede propter honorem et gloriam nominis tui, ut cum multo bono fructu fraternae societatis, merear pervenire ad gloriam tuam: non est tibi enim quidquam difficile, non aliquid impossibile. Velle tuum, facere; voluntas tua, opus est. Et ideo corde credo, et ore confiteor quod tu potes et vis opus illud magnifice adimplere per me tantillum: scio, et certus sum quod tu vales fructus bonos et magnos facere de grege tuo per me exiguum et infirmum.

Parvulus quippe sum, et nullius virtutis homuncio, nihil habens in me quod expediat, vel quod dignum sit tanti officii, idcirco desperans omnimodis de parvitate, non respiro nisi in sola misericordia tua.

Sed licet sis magnus in magnis, gloriosius tamen operaris magna in minimis. Erit certe tua laus dulcior, et copiosior in ore hominum, cum per me tantillum operari dignus fueris magna de grege tuo. Mitte ergo in auxilium meum sanctum angelum tuum de coelis, qui me adjuvans in omnibus, prosperari istud opus faciat in manu mea; ita ut glorificetur nomen tuum benedictum in me misero peccatore. Dives in misericordia, largus in muneribus, qui omnibus omnia tribuis et nihil perdis, da mihi coelestia et terrena subsidia ad omnem sufficientiam, ut habeam unde gregem tuum possim pascere et sustentare tam spiritualiter quam corporaliter, atque venientes in tuo nomine suscipere absque ulla haesitatione, simulque loca commissa ordinare et praeparare ad quietem et salutem fratrum, sicut decet et oportet. Omnia a te haec postulo, Domine Deus noster, quia cuncta bona nostra, dona tua sunt. Non enim aliunde possumus tibi servire neque placere, nisi de tuo munere.

At si non forte est in consilio aeternae voluntatis tuae, ut facias per me de ovibus tuis fructum bonum et magnum, obsecro et suppliciter rogo, dissolve me a nexu tanti officii, modis quibus tibi videtur, or dine quo tibi placet. Scis enim omnia, et potes omnia. Quid hic facio? Quid moror in his tumultibus, si facturus non sum per gratiam tuam aliquid boni de fratrum salute? Duo a te peto: unum horum pro tua clementia ne deneges mihi. Rogo te per omnes miserationes tuas, da mihi consolationem tuam coelestem in multis tribulationibus meis. Pondus enim istud gravissimum, quod impositum est super cervices meas, ferre non valeo, deponere timeo: angustiae mihi sunt undique, et quid eligam ignoro. Adjutor omnium in te sperantium Deus, ne me deserat pietas tua, ne me derelinquat gratia tua.

In te sperantem Deus, et in tua misericordia solummodo confidentem adjuva me; quia sine te tibi placere non valeo. Quis unquam speravit in te, et derelictus est? Non est auditum a saeculo. Deus tu es optimus infinitae pietatis et immensae bonitatis, qui in te sperantes nunquam consuevisti relinquere. Ostende, quaeso, misericordiam tuam in me, quia ad te confugi, ut videant qui me oderunt, et confundantur; quoniam tu, Domine, adjuvisti me et consolatus es me.

Gratias tibi ago, Domine, quia me et a vano hujus mundi consortio separasti, et ad tuum sanctum officium perduxisti, nullis meis meritis, sed sola dignatione misericordiae tuae. Benedico te, Domine Deus noster, qui mihi das indigno servorum tuorum societate et charitate perfrui. Da mihi quietem, et salutem corporis et animae, simulque opportunam ad te vacationem. Libera me a vanissimis hujus mundi implicationibus ad profectum animae meae, propter honorem et gloriam nominis tui; et quia scriptum est: Nemo militans Deo implicat se saecularibus negotiis, et ab omnibus curarum tumultibus separas animas servientium tibi, ut tibi soli Domino vacent die ac nocte; da fructuosum et spiritale otium abrenuntiantibus mundo, ut ipso cordis palato gustent et sapiant quoniam dulcis et suavis es, Domine, sicut tua Scriptura admonet, dicens: Vacate et videte, quoniam ego sum Deus. Et alibi: Sapientiam discite in tempore olii, et qui minoratur actu ipse percipiet eam. Sed et sacratissima sententia tua ore tuo pio prolata plenius informat nos, et a mundanis curis prorsus prohibet, dicens: Non potestis Deo servire et mammonae. Et rursum: Nemo mittens manum suam ad aratrum, et aspiciens retro, aptus est regno coelorum. Et alibi nos evidenti exemplo retrahere dignaris, dicens: Mementote uxoris Lot.

Gratias tibi ago, misericordissime Domine, qui me miserum multumque negligentem peccatorem a principio, et a cunabulis per universa pene vitia et peccata decurrentem, benigne et patienter adhuc ad poenitentiam exspectas, nolens me perdere cum peccatis, vitiis, culpis et negligentiis meis. Si enim mihi, Domine, secundum peccata mea facere voluisses, olim me terra vivum absorbere debuisset. Sed rogo, pie Domine, ne tua in me exspectatio sit vacua, sit quod absit, infructuosa. Tu qui non vis mortem peccatoris, da mihi de praeteritis malis meis indulgentiam; de praesentibus concede emendationem; de futuris vero largire jugiter custodiam atque cautelam. Da locum et spatium ad dignos poenitentiae fructus. Aperi oculos cordis mei per Spiritum sanctum tuum, ut videam et plangam omnia peccata mea. Domine, tempus est acceptabile, et dies sunt salutis. Miserere mei, Domine, et ne perdas me cum peccatis meis, ne reserves mala mea punienda in illa futura vita, in illis infernalibus suppliciis, in illo tremendo examine tuo.

Propter magnam clementiam tuam solve omnium peccatorum meorum vincula, priusquam ab hac vita egrediar. Da mihi cor contritum et humiliatum, da mihi gratiam lacrymarum. Da lumen in corde, da vires in corpore, ut quae agenda sunt videam, et ad ea implenda, quae videro, fortiter convalescam cunctis diebus vitae meae. Miserere mei, Domine, miserere mei. Non permittas hanc animam peccatricem, pro qua et nasci de Virgine, et mori in cruce dignatus es; non jubeas, quaeso, separari eam ab hoc mortali corpore priusquam me facias plene et perfecte poenitere, et plangere omnia peccata mea quaecunque egi post baptismum ab ipsis cunabulis meis, sive scienter et nescienter, sive superbe, vel negligenter; ita ut in die exitus mei, emundatis dilectis omnibus et bene correctis moribus, securus et gaudens videam dulcissimam et pulcherrimam faciem tuam cum laetitia et exsultatione propter tuam nimiam misericordiam et bonitatem.

Gratias tibi ago iterum iterumque, omnipotens et misericors Christe, qui immeritam exiguitatem meam propter te, et nomen sanctum tuum, de multis angustiis, tribulationibus, calamitatibus et infirmitatibus; de multis foveis, laqueis, scandalo, et peccatis; de multis insidiis visibilium et invisibilium inimicorum; de multis malis, et gravissimis periculis hactenus liberare dignatus es, dirigens mirabiliter et misericorditer vitam meam inter adversa et prospera; ita ut nec adversa me dejicerent, nec prospera extollerent. Posuisti enim frenum tuum in maxillis meis, et non dereliquisti me penitus in manu arbitrii mei, habens curam mei paterna pietate, et non permittens amplius tentari supra id quod potero sustinere. Ubi locus fuit peccandi, quandoque non fuit voluntas; vel quando voluntas, non fuit locus.

Sit itaque tibi laus, sit benedictio, sit gratiarum actio, Domine Deus meus, pro universis tuis donis et datis, et pro omnibus beneficiis tuis, quae animae et corpori meo largiris, et semper largitus es ab ipsis cunabulis, pro pietate tua, et bonitate, nullis meis meritis exigentibus, imo peccatis meis gravissimis non obstantibus. Sed rogo, Domine, rogo ne sinas me ingratum esse tantis beneficiis, et indignum tam multis miserationibus. Non mihi, non diabolo, non mundo, non alicui rerum, non cuilibet hominum liceat in me tua dona subvertere, quia totum est fragile quidquid tibi nititur obviare. Pone, quaeso, magis magisque frenum tuum in maxillis meis, et trahe me post te tanquam mansuetum animal, in nullo tuis jussionibus recalcitrantem, sed plano moderatoque incessu te Dominum meum portantem, et voluntati tuae in omnibus obtemperantem. Excita, Domine, torporem meum tuis stimulis, et fac me toto corde totaque virtute quaerere faciem tuam cunctis diebus vitae meae. Attrahe me ad te, virtus salutis nostrae, Deus, freno potentis gratiae tuae, et non sinas me propria voluntate in arbitrio proprio evagari. Imaginem tuam non sinas in me obscurari; quae si te praestante defendatur, semper egregia, nobilis et perspicua est. Miserere, Domine, mei miserrimi et indigni servi tui, quia non sum sicut innumeri et multiplices famuli tui, qui tibi ab ipsis cunabulis devotissime servierunt; non sicut illi qui post publica flagitia poenitendo, tibi meruerunt esse devoti.

Non sum sicut nonnullae Christianae feminae viris conjunctae quae tibi serviunt in actibus misericordiae cum summa devotione. Non sum sicut et multi illorum qui in oculis hominum tanquam iniqui et perversi esse videntur, sed multo aliter se habent in conspectu tuo: Tu enim solus nosti corda filiorum hominum. Si quid tamen, Domine, boni facio, aut fecero, tua gratia largiente, quo fine hoc faciam, quave districtione a te pensetur, ignoro. Unde, Deus terribilis in consiliis super filios hominum, tuam sanctam et immensam supplex et multum tremens deprecor clementiam, ut qui neminem vis perire, sed omnes salvos facere, non me derelinquas in manu consilii mei, neque in judicio arbitrii mei, neque in potestate aut tentatione daemonum, neque in errante judicio aut noxio consilio hominum, sed pro bonitate ac pietate tua, juxta suam benignissimam, quae in sui dispositione falli non potest, providentiam, dispone hic et ubique, nunc et semper, dies vitae meae in beneplacito tuo, et dirige per Spiritum sanctum tuum cor, linguam, actusque meos secundum voluntatem tuam in tua misericordia ut te rectore, te duce illa semper studeam cogitare, loqui et agere quae tibi placent, per gratiam tuam in veritate; et me tandem ad vitam perducant aeternam, te miserante et donante, qui es largitor omnium bonorum, et qui es Deus benedictus cum Patre et Spiritu sancto in saecula saeculorum. Amen.

Scripture echoes

  1. ↩John.6.51 — I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. And the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.
  2. ↩John.10.11 — I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.
  3. ↩John.8.12;Ps.27.1 — Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, 'I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.' Ps.27.1 — Of David. The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life; whom shall I dread?
  4. ↩Heb.11.16 — But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.
  5. ↩Phil.1.6 — I am confident of this very thing, that the one who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
  6. ↩Gal.5.6 — For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any power; but only faith working through love.
  7. ↩Rom.8.15;Gal.4.5 — For you did not receive a spirit of slavery again to fear, but you received a spirit of adoption, in which we cry, "Abba, Father." Gal.4.5 — in order to redeem those under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.
  8. ↩Titus.3.5 — not by works of righteousness that we ourselves had done, but according to his mercy he saved us, through the washing of renewal and rebirth and the renewing of the Holy Spirit,
  9. ↩Eccl.10.2;Matt.25.33 — A wise man's heart inclines to the right, but a fool's heart to the left. Matt.25.33 — And he will place the sheep at his right hand, but the goats at his left.
  10. ↩Jas.1.17 — Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.
  11. ↩Ps.22.5 — In you our fathers trusted; they trusted, and you delivered them.
  12. ↩Ps.69.7 — Let me not be put to shame because of those who wait for you, O Lord, Yahweh of hosts; let me not be humiliated because of those who seek you, O God of Israel.
  13. ↩2Tim.2.4 — No one serving as a soldier gets entangled in the affairs of civilian life, in order to please the one who enlisted him.
  14. ↩Ps.45.11;Ps.47.10 — Listen, daughter, and see; incline your ear, and forget your people and your father's house. Ps.47.10 — The princes of the peoples have gathered together, the people of the God of Abraham; for to God belong the shields of the earth — He is greatly exalted.
  15. ↩Matt.6.24;Luke.16.13 — No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money. Luke.16.13 — No servant can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.
  16. ↩Luke.9.62 — Jesus said to him, "No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God."
  17. ↩Luke.17.32 — Remember Lot's wife.
  18. ↩Num.16.31-Num.16.33 — And it came to pass, when he had finished speaking all these words, that the ground that was under them split open. Num.16.32 — and the earth opened its mouth and swallowed them and their households, and all the people who belonged to Korah, and all their possessions Num.16.33 — They went down alive into Sheol, along with all that belonged to them; the earth closed over them, and they perished from the assembly.
  19. ↩Ezek.33.11 — Say to them, 'As I live, declares the Lord GOD, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that the wicked turn from his way and live. Turn, turn from your evil ways! For why should you die, O house of Israel?'
  20. ↩Matt.3.8;Luke.3.8 — Therefore bear fruit worthy of repentance. Luke.3.8 — Therefore, produce fruits worthy of repentance, and do not begin to say among yourselves, 'We have Abraham as our father.' For I tell you that God is able to raise up children for Abraham from these stones.
  21. ↩Eph.1.18 — having the eyes of your heart enlightened, so that you may know what is the hope of his calling, what is the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints,
  22. ↩2Cor.6.2 — For he says, 'In an acceptable time I listened to you, and on a day of salvation I helped you.' Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation.
  23. ↩Ps.50.19 — You send your mouth toward evil, and your tongue frames deceit.
  24. ↩Ps.50.3;Luke.18.13 — Our God comes and will not be silent; a fire devours before him, and around him a great tempest rages. Luke.18.13 — But the tax collector, standing far off, was not even willing to lift his eyes to heaven, but kept beating his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, the sinner.'
  25. ↩Ps.25.15 — My eyes are ever toward the LORD, for he will free my feet from the net.
  26. ↩1Cor.10.13 — No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to humanity. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear, but with the temptation he will also provide the way out, so that you may be able to endure it.
  27. ↩Ps.32.9 — Do not be like a horse or a mule, without understanding, whose temper must be curbed with bit and bridle — or it will not come near you.
  28. ↩Ps.27.8 — My heart says of you, 'Seek my face.' Your face, LORD, I will seek.
  29. ↩Acts.9.5-Acts.9.6 — He said, "Who are you, Lord?" And the Lord said, "I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting." Acts.9.6 — But rise and enter the city, and it will be told you what you must do.
  30. ↩Ps.28.8 — The LORD is their strength, and he is the saving refuge of his anointed.
  31. ↩Gen.1.26-Gen.1.27 — Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, according to our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth." Gen.1.27 — So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
  32. ↩2Cor.3.18 — And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord as in a mirror, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.
  33. ↩Luke.7.37-Luke.7.50 — And behold, a woman who was in the city, a sinner, having learned that he was reclining in the house of the Pharisee, brought an alabaster flask of ointment Luke.7.38 — and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears, and wiped them with the hair of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment. Luke.7.39 — Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, 'If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is: that she is a sinner.' Luke.7.40 — And Jesus answered him, "Simon, I have something to say to you." And he said, "Teacher, speak." Luke.7.41 — There were two debtors to a certain lender; one owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. Luke.7.42 — Since neither of them had the means to repay him, he graciously canceled the debt for both. Which of them, therefore, will love him more? Luke.7.43 — Simon answered and said, 'I suppose the one to whom the more was forgiven.' And he said to him, 'You have judged correctly.' Luke.7.44 — Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered your house. You gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. Luke.7.45 — You gave me no kiss, but she has not stopped kissing my feet since I arrived. Luke.7.46 — You did not anoint my head with oil, but this woman has anointed my feet with ointment. Luke.7.47 — Therefore I tell you, her many sins are forgiven, as her great love shows. But the one who is forgiven little loves little. Luke.7.48 — And he said to her, "Your sins are forgiven." Luke.7.49 — And those who were reclining with him began to say among themselves, 'Who is this who even forgives sins?' Luke.7.50 — But he said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."
  34. ↩Luke.23.39-Luke.23.43 — One of the criminals who were hanged there kept heaping insults on him, saying, "Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!" Luke.23.40 — But the other one answered, rebuking him: 'Do you not even fear God, since you are under the same judgment?' Luke.23.41 — And we indeed justly, for we are receiving what we have earned; but this man has done nothing wrong. Luke.23.42 — And he was saying, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." Luke.23.43 — And he said to him, "Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise."

Notes

  1. 1 ↩hamilem: rare form, possibly a variant of humilem ('humble'). Translated as 'humble' following the candidate gloss and context.
  2. 2 ↩lucerna ardens et lucens: 'burning and shining lamp' echoes the image of the lamp in the house of God (cf. Psalm 131:17 Vulg. / 2 Peter 1:19); candidate allusion pending Moses resolution.
  3. 3 ↩fueris: ambiguous form (future perfect indicative or perfect subjunctive); rendered as future perfect to fit the prophetic-assurance tone.
  4. 4 ↩Cor contritum et humiliatum echoes Psalm 50:19 (Vulgate); the phrase carries established scriptural weight. Candidate allusion flagged for Moses resolution.
  5. 5 ↩Lumen rendered as 'light' (interior illumination) rather than literal 'lamp/lumen' to preserve the devotional sense of spiritual clarity.
  6. 6 ↩Emundatis dilectis omnibus et bene correctis moribus is treated as an ablative absolute ('with all my beloved ones cleansed and my ways well corrected'), though the referent of 'beloved ones' (dilectis) is ambiguous — it could mean the soul's faculties, the faithful departed, or loved ones. Translation preserves the ambiguity.
  7. 7 ↩Anima rendered as 'soul' per lexeme policy; peccatrix rendered as 'sinful' to preserve the gendered Latin while keeping natural English.
  8. 8 ↩Deus terribilis in consiliis: 'terrible' here conveys awe-inspiring majesty in divine planning, not petty fright; rendered to preserve the weight of the Latin.
  9. 9 ↩The long chain of neque... neque... neque... neque is rendered as a series of 'or' clauses to keep the rhythm natural in English while preserving the force of the repeated negations.

Orationes sive Meditationes — Collection for Princess Adeliza of Normandy companion

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