R85: Berthold von Zwiefalten an Hildegard von Rupertsberg
Greeting from a Humbled Abbot
Berthold, abbot of Zwiefalten, humbly addresses Hildegard as God's handmaid and confesses his own unworthiness while longing to speak with her face to face about the tribulations inflicted by his persecutors.
The abbot of Zwiefalten. To Hildegard. Hildegard, handmaid of God, from the mountain of Saint Robert in Bingen! B. The man of Zwiefalten, abbot in name only — dust and ashes! Whatever the prayer of a sinner can do. I've been longing for your company for a long time now, and I wanted to raise my cry to you face to face. About the wrongs and tribulations that cruel persecutors inflict on me.
An Urgent Plea Amid Persecution
Berthold explains that although Hildegard's words have brought him joy, their obscurity has also grieved him, so he sends a tearful messenger begging her to help him seek God's will and send back written comfort.
They're trying to reduce me to nothing. For although I've often been made more joyful by the consolation of your words— yet because of their obscurities — since they didn't fully open up to my understanding — I've only grown sadder. So I'm sending a messenger to you — and with tearful, wretched pleas I'm pounding at your ears. So that, to the best of my small ability, we might seek God's will regarding the hardships pressing down on us — would you send me back some comfort by letter.
Fear of Despair in Tribulation
Berthold confesses his deep fear that the unusual storm of tribulation may scatter his mind and drown him in despair.
I'm deeply afraid that my mind might be scattered by an unusual storm of tribulation and that it might be submerged in the depths of despair.
Read the original Latin
Abbas Zvviueldensis. hildegardi. Hildigardi ancillę dei de monte sancti roberti in pingis! B. zvviueldensis solo nomine abbas puluis et cinis! quicquid potest oracio peccatoris. Colloquium uestrum iam multo tempore desiderans uolui ore ad os clamorem uobis facere. de iniurijs et tribulationibus quas crudeles persecutores mihi inferunt.
dum me ad nichilum redigere contendunt. Licet enim consolationibus uerborum uestrorum factus sim sepe letior. obscuritatibus tamen eorum eo quod non plene intellectui meo paterent. factus sum tristior. Unde nuncium huc ad uos mittens. lacrimosis et miserabilibus peticionibus aures uestras pulso. ut pro capacitate ingenioli mei super angustijs quę nobis incumbunt uoluntatem dei inquirentes! aliquod solacium per litteras mihi remittatis.
Valde enim pertimesco. ne mens mea tempestate insolitę tribulationis dispergatur! et ne profundo desperationis immergatur.
Epistolae: Letters to Frederick Barbarossa and Henry II of England companion
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