SR
Chapter 45Erud.1.45

De pudice societatis et famulatus eleccione.

The Two Wounds of Bad Company

Immodest companions harm chastity by example and suggestion, so a daughter must be entrusted to a holy and serious companion whose whole bearing teaches virtue.

These are the excesses to be avoided in matters that pertain to the pleasure of the flesh, which is the enemy of chastity. Furthermore, concerning bad and immodest company, it must be known that among boys and girls such association harms or damages the good of chastity in two ways, namely: by example and by suggestion. For this reason Jerome writes to Alethe about the upbringing of a daughter. 'Entrust her,' he says, 'to a companion of holiness. . . Let her companion's speech and bearing and demeanor be an instruction in the virtues.

Guarding the Daughter in Public and in Private

A daughter must never go out unattended and must not be exposed to the gaze of vain, curly-haired young men.

. . Never let her go out in public without you. . . No curly-haired young man should grin at her. . .

Choosing a Serious and Unadorned Companion

The companion must not favor one maidservant with secret whispers, and she should be grave, pale, and unadorned rather than beautiful or musical, as Jerome counsels for Demetrias.

I also don't want her to favor one of her maidservants more than the others — the one who's always whispering in her ear. But whatever she says to one person, let all the others know it. As for her companion, let it be someone by no means adorned or beautiful — not one who sings sweet songs with a clear, trained voice — but serious, and pale. . . somewhat sad.' The same author also describes the kind of companion to be chosen for Demetrias the virgin, speaking in this way: 'Let serious women be chosen as your companions — especially virgins and widows — whose conduct is proven, whose speech is measured, and whose modesty is holy.' Flee, moreover, the wantonness of girls who adorn their heads, let their hair down from the forehead, and polish their skin. .

The Wantonness of Adorned Girls and Effeminate Boys

Girls who dress tightly and adorn themselves, and boys with curled hair and effeminate dress, must be avoided as threats to chastity.

. They wear tight sleeves, wrinkle-free clothes, and curly-toed shoes — all so they can seem more appealing under the guise of virginity. In fact, people generally judge a lady's character and pursuits by the character of her maidservants and companions. Let the woman who accompanies you be beautiful and lovely — one who doesn't know she's beautiful, who pays no attention to her looks, and who, when going out in public, by no means bares her chest and neck, nor throws back her cloak to expose her throat, but covers her face and walks with barely one eye open — just the one the road requires. . . And then there are boys with ringlets curled by a curling iron, smelling of foreign — [the text is uncertain here] — in their little cloaks. .

Avoiding Effeminate and Dangerous Attendants

Effeminate attendants and actors must be shunned like plagues; servants should be respected as men, and if household duties require it, an old man of honor should be placed in charge.

. Avoid them like the plagues and poisons of chastity they are. The same author also writes to Salvinia: 'What are you doing,' he says, . . among crowds of servants? I don't want you to look down on them as mere servants, but to hold them in respect as men. Certainly, if the duties of the household demand it in a way that risks appearances, let an old man of honorable character be placed in charge — one whose respectability will be the lady's dignity.

The Scandal of Hidden Lust in the Household

Even behind closed doors, women risk scandal through effeminate or lustful attendants; therefore the heart must be guarded and dangerous companions avoided.

I know that many women, even with the doors shut against the public, have not escaped the scandal of boys — boys made suspect either by immodest dress, or by the sleek sheen of a coarse body, or by an age ripe for lust, or by a swelling of the spirit that comes from the awareness of a hidden love, which, even when well concealed, frequently bursts out into the open and looks down on fellow servants as though they were slaves. So guard your heart with every watchfulness, and beware of whatever can be fabricated against you. Don't let a curly-haired steward walk beside you, nor an actor broken into a woman, nor the devil's singer with his poisoned sweetness, nor a young man with sleek, well-groomed hair. Let nothing of old women's ways, nothing soft or effeminate, be joined to you in your service. Seek the comfort of your own sex — that is, the company of widows and virgins. So writes Jerome. The same author writes in his letter to a mother and daughter: 'Among wanton girls and long-haired young men — .

The Temptation of Social Gatherings

At banquets and in public, a young woman will encounter seductive glances, forbidden touches, and luxurious displays that inflame desire.

. Young men. . . As you go about as a girl, any beardless young man at all will offer you his hand. . . With her fingers pressed together, she'll either be touched or will touch. Among the men and matrons there'll be a banquet for you; you'll watch the kisses of others. . . In other things too you'll marvel at silken and gold-embroidered garments. . . Amid all this, some guest or attendant — since he won't be watching other men's wives, and you have no guardian — will look back at you more often, will speak with nods, and will signify with his eyes whatever he's afraid to say.

The Power of Lust and the Need for Vigilance

Even iron wills are tamed by lust, especially in virgins who imagine the unknown to be sweeter; the author has seen young people consumed by illicit passion.

Among these and so many allurements of pleasure, lust tames even iron wills — and it rages all the more fiercely in virgins, while they imagine the unknown to be sweeter just because they have never known it. . . We've seen it ourselves. . . We've seen someone barely clinging to their bones, consumed by illicit passions — who wasted away from the plague of desire before they ever wasted away from life itself. What will you do, girl — with your healthy body, your delicate ways, your plump figure, blushing and burning — surrounded by rich food and wine and baths, close to husbands, close to young men?

Jerome's Warning Against Noble Households

Jerome warns against visiting noble married women and their households, where painted widows and flattering company corrupt the soul.

And if you're asked and don't comply, even so, you should consider it a shameful testimony if you're compelled. These are Jerome's words. On this same matter, the same author also writes to Eustochium. 'I don't want you,' he says, 'to go frequently to the homes of noble married women, and I want you to avoid not only their company but also the company of their husbands, who are puffed up with honors, whom flocks of eunuchs surround, and also those whom necessity has made widows. . . Their houses are full of reproaches, full of flatterers; with their cheeks blushing, their painted skin is stretched so tight that you'd think they haven't lost their husbands but are looking for them. These are Jerome's words.

The Apostle's Warning on Younger Widows

Following 1 Timothy 5, younger widows must be avoided because they break their vow of continence, become idle gossips, and hand themselves over to the devil.

The Apostle also speaks of widows of this kind in 1 Timothy, chapter 5. 'Younger widows,' he says, 'avoid.' For when they have given themselves over to desire, they are unwilling to marry in Christ, since they bring condemnation on themselves. — that is, the faith stored up with God, because their first faith — — or the vow they previously made, which they professed in baptism by renouncing the devil and all his pomp — they have made void. They break their vow of continence and so hand themselves over to the devil once again. At the same time he says: 'They learn to go about from house to house idly, and not only idly, but also gossiping and meddlesomely, speaking things that are not proper.' — whatever is shameful and immodest.

Gossipy Widows as Pimps of Shameful Love

Gossipy widows who go from house to house are like brokers of lust, whose tongues are venomous as vipers, fulfilling Joel 3 and Job 20.

Hence Jerome, in the letter already mentioned, says of such people: 'Cast out those gossipy widows like the pests they are, who idly and curiously go about the houses of matrons.'1 . . They care about nothing except their belly.2 . . They insinuate anything evil, wine-soaked and wanton, and they soften even iron-hard minds to sensual pleasures.3 For such old women are brokers and pimps of shameful love, and to them rightly applies what is said in Joel 3: 'They put,' it says, 'the boy in a brothel and sold the girl for wine, that they might drink.' The tongues of such women are venomous and deadly, just like the tongue of a viper, of which it is said in Job 20: 'It will suck the head of asps, and the viper's tongue will kill him.'4567

The Devil's Bellows: Corrupt Old Women as Incendiaries

Like the devil's bellows, such old women kindle the fire of lust in the young; they are incendiaries of God's temples and deserve excommunication and death.

And since they are black and wrinkled like a bellows, they are truly the devil's bellows, kindling the hearts of young men and young women with the fire of lust by the wicked breath of suggestion, according to that passage of Isaiah 53: 'Behold, I have created the smith who blows upon the fire of burning coals and brings forth a tool for his work; and I have created the destroyer to destroy.' That is why it is said of the devil himself in Job 41: 'His breath makes burning coals blaze, and a flame goes forth from his mouth.' Of these same lustful ones, kindled by the breath of his bellows, it is said in Hosea 7: 'All who commit adultery are like an oven heated by the baker.' And further on: 'They have applied their heart like an oven while he lay in wait for them, and all night I slept, baking them.' Old women of this kind are therefore incendiary and excommunicate, because they are incendiaries of the temples of God — that is, of souls — according to that passage in the First Letter to the Corinthians. Chapter 3: 'For the temple of God is holy, and that is what you are.' If anyone violates the temple of God, God will destroy that person. For by that very right, incendiaries of churches are excommunicated, and they are also liable for sacrilege and subject to death.

Flattery as Spiritual Nursing and the Basilisk's Hiss

Through flattery and deceit, such women seduce the innocent like the devil's preachers; one such woman destroys many souls, like a basilisk that kills by hissing.

They are also incendiaries through deceit, because they carry hidden fire, while through sweet speeches and blessings — that is, flatteries — they seduce the hearts of the innocent, just as it is said about them at the end of Romans: 'Whence are they infernal lamias,' of whom it is said in Lamentations four: 'The lamias have stripped bare their breasts, they have nursed their young, etc.'8 For nursing is flattery, about which it is said in Proverbs one: 'My son, if sinners have nursed you, do not consent to them.'9 For such women are the devil's own preachers. And when Christ on the cross acquired one soul — namely, that of the thief —10 one such old woman destroys many souls through her wicked persuasion. Wherefore she is rightly compared to the basilisk, which is also called the hisser, according to Isidore, because it kills by hissing before it bites or burns.11 These are the things concerning chastity, in which girls especially ought to be guarded and educated.

Read the original Latin

Hec de superfluitatibus euitandis in hiis que pertinent ad uoluptatem carnis, que inimica est castitatis. Porro de mala et impudica societate sciendum, quod in pueris ac puellis castitatis bonum ledit uel dampnificat dupliciter, sc. exemplo ac suggestione. Ideo scribit Jeronimus alethe de institucione filie. ‘Trade,’ inquit, ‘ei comitem sanctitatis . . . cuius est sermo et incessus et habitus doctrina virtutum sit .

. . Nunquam absque te in publicum procedat . . . nullus ei iuuenis cicinnatus arrideat . . .

Nolo eciam, quod de ancillis suis aliquam plus diligat, cuius crebro auribus insusurret. Sed quicquid uni loquetur, hoc sciant omnes; placeat ei comes nequaquam compta atque formosa, que liquido gutture carmen dulce moduletur, sed grauis, pallens . . . subtristis.’ Idem quoque describit ad demetriadem uirginem, hoc modo dicens: ‘Graues femine, maximeque uirgines ac uidue tibi comites eligantur quarum conuersacio sit probata, sermo moderatus, uerecundia sancta. Fuge autem lasciuiam puellarum que ornant capita, crines a fronte demittunt, cutem polliunt . .

. astrictas habent manicas, uestimenta sine ruga, soccosque crispantes, ut sub nomine uirginali uendibilius appareant. Mores siquidem et studia dominarum plerumque iudicantur ex moribus ancillarum et comitum. illa ergo tibi pulcra sit et amabilis, illa tibi socia, que pulcram se esse nescit, que forme bonum negligit et procedens ad publicum nequaquam pectus et colla denudat, nec pallio reuelato ceruices aperit, sed faciem celat et uix oculo uno, qui uie necessarius est, patente incedit . . . Porro cicinnatulos pueros et calamistratos ac peregrini muris olentes pelliculas . .

. quasi pestes ac uenena pudicicie deuita.’ Idem etiam ad saluiniam: ‘Quid facis,’ inquit, ‘ . . . inter ministrorum greges? Quos uolo non ut famulos contempnas, sed ut uiros erubescas. certe, si ambiciose domus hec officia flagitant, preficiatur hiis senex honestis moribus cuius honor domine dignitas sit.

Scio multas clausis ad publicum foribus non caruisse infamia puerorum, quos suspectos faciebat uel cultus impudicus uel crassi corporis nitor uel etas apta libidini uel ex consciencia amoris occulti sequtus animi tumor, qui etiam bene dissimilatus frequenter in publicum erumpit et conseruos quasi seruos despicit. Omni ergo custodia serua cor tuum et caue quicquid de te fingi potest. Non ambulet iuxta te calamistratus procurator, non hystrio fractus in feminam, non cantoris dyaboli uenenata dulcedo, non iuuenis uolsus et nitidus. Nichil arcium senicarum, nichil tibi in obsequiis molle iungatur. habeto tui sexus solacia,’ id est uiduarum et uirginum choros. Hec Jeronimus. Idem in epistola ad matrem et filiam: ‘Inter lasciuas puellas et comatos . .

. iuuenes . . . puella graderis. Dabit tibi barbatulus quilibet manum . . .

pressisque digitis aut temptabitur aut temptabit. Inter uiros et matronas erit tibi conuiuium, aliena oscula spectabis . . . In aliis quoque sericas auratasque uestes miraberis . . . Inter hec aliquis conuiuancium uel assistencium, quoniam alienas uxores non uidebit, te que custodem non habes sepius respectabit, loquetur nutibus et quicquid metuit dicere, significabit aspectibus.

Inter has et tantas illecebras uoluptatum eciam ferreas mentes libido domat, que maiorem in uirginibus patitur famem, dum dulcius putat esse quod nescit . . . vidimus . . . aliquem ossibus uix herentem illicitis arsisse amoribus et ante uita caruisse quam peste. Quid tu facies, puella sani corporis, delicata, pinguis, rubens, estuans inter carnes et vina et balnea, iuxta maritos, iuxta adolescentes?

Que et si rogata non feceris, tamen deforme putes testimonium, si cogeris.’ hec Jeronimus. De hoc etiam idem scribit ad eustochium. ‘Nolo,’ inquit, ‘te ad domos matronarum nobilium frequenter accedere, nec illarum tantummodo te cupio uitare congressum que maritorum inflantur honoribus, quas eunuchorum greges sepiunt, sed eciam eas quas uiduas necessitas fecit . . . quarum domus plena conuiciis, plena adulatoribus, quarum rubentibus buccis cutis farsa distenditur, ut eas putes maritos non amisisse, sed querere.’ Hec Jeronimus.

Et de huiusmodi etiam uiduis loquitur apostolus in Ia ad thymotheum v. ‘Adolescenciores,’ inquit, ‘uiduas deuita. Cum enim luxuriate fuerint, in christo nubere nolunt, habentes dampnacionem,’ sc. apud deum repositam, ‘quia primam fidem,’ sc. uoti prius emissi uel fidem, quam professe sunt in baptismo, dyabolo et pompis eius abrenunciando ‘irritam fecerunt,’ sc. uotum continencie frangendo et sic iterum dyabolo se mancipando. Simul autem inquit: ‘et ociose discunt circuire domos, non solum ociose, sed eciam umbrose et curiose, loquentes que non oportet,’ sc. turpia quelibet et impudica.

unde et Jeronimus in epistola supradicta dicit de talibus: ‘illas quoque viduas rumigerulas quasi pestes abice, que ociose et curiose circueunt domos matronarum . . . Nulla hiis nisi uentris cura est . . . vinose atque lasciue quiduis mali insinuant et ferreas quoque mentes ad delicias emolliunt.’ Huiusmodi namque sunt uetule turpis amoris mediatrices atque conciliatrices quibus recte congruit quod dicitur in iohele iii: ‘Posuerunt,’ inquit, ‘puerum in prostibulo et puellam uendiderunt pro uino, ut biberent’; talium lingue sunt uenenose ac mortifere, sicut est lingua uipere de qua dicitur in iob xx: ‘Caput aspidum sugget et occidet eum lingua uipere.’

Cumque nigre sint ac rugose in modum follis, reuera sunt folles dyaboli, flatu male suggestionis corda iuuenum atque iuuencularum igne libidinis accendentes, iuxta illud ysaye liiii: ‘Ecce ego creaui fabrum sufflantem in igne prunas et proferentem uas in opus suum et interfectorem ad perdendum.’ unde de ipso dyabolo dicitur in iob xli: ‘halitus eius prunas ardere facit et flamma de ore eius egreditur.’ De ipsis quoque luxuriosis flatu follium eius accensis dicitur in osee vii: ‘Omnes adulterantes quasi clibanus succensus a coquente.’ Et post: ‘applicauerunt quasi clibanum cor suum, cum insidiaretur eis, et tota nocte dormiui coquens eos.’ Sunt igitur huiusmodi uetule incendiarie et ideo excommunicate, quia sunt incendiarie templorum dei, id est animarum, iuxta illud Ia ad corinth. iii: ‘Templum enim dei sanctum est, quod estis uos.’ Siquis autem templum uiolauerit dei, disperdet illum deus. Ipso namque iure excommunicati sunt ecclesiarum incendiarij et etiam in sacrilegio et morti obnoxij.

Sunt eciam incendiarie per dolum, quia portant ignem absconditum, dum per dulces sermones ac benedicciones, id est adulaciones, seducunt corda innocencium, sicut de quibus dicitur ad romanos ultimo: ‘unde sunt lamie infernales,’ de quibus dicitur in trenis iiii: ‘lamie nudauerunt mammas, lactauerunt catulos suos etc.’ lactacio enim est adulacio, de qua dicitur in prouerbiis i: ‘Fili, si te lactauerint peccatores, non acquiescas eis.’ Tales enim sunt predicatrices dyaboli. Cumque christus in cruce unicam animam, sc. latronis, acquisierit, unica talis uetula multas animas iniqua suasione perdit. unde recte comparatur basilisco, qui et sibilus dicitur secundum ysidorum, quoniam sibilo occidit, antequam mordeat uel exureat. Hec de castitate, in qua puelle precipue custodire debent et erudiri.

Scripture echoes

  1. Prov.4.23Above all else, guard your heart, for from it flow the springs of life.
  2. 1Tim.5.11But refuse younger widows, for when they grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry,
  3. 1Tim.5.11-1Tim.5.12But refuse younger widows, for when they grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry, 1Tim.5.12 — They incur judgment because they have rejected their first faith.
  4. 1Tim.5.12They incur judgment because they have rejected their first faith.
  5. 1Tim.5.12They incur judgment because they have rejected their first faith.
  6. 1Tim.5.13And at the same time they also learn to be idle, going about from house to house; and not only idle, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they should not.
  7. 1Tim.5.11-1Tim.5.15But refuse younger widows, for when they grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry, 1Tim.5.12 — They incur judgment because they have rejected their first faith. 1Tim.5.13 — And at the same time they also learn to be idle, going about from house to house; and not only idle, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they should not. 1Tim.5.14 — So I want younger women to marry, to bear children, to manage their households, and to give the adversary no occasion for slander. 1Tim.5.15 — For some have already turned aside after Satan.
  8. Joel.3.3And I will give wonders in the heavens and on the earth: blood, and fire, and columns of smoke.
  9. Job.20.16He will suck the venom of asps; the tongue of a viper will kill him.
  10. 1Cor.3.16-1Cor.3.17Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? 1Cor.3.17 — If anyone destroys the temple of God, God will destroy that person. For the temple of God is holy, and you are that temple.
  11. 1Cor.3.17If anyone destroys the temple of God, God will destroy that person. For the temple of God is holy, and you are that temple.
  12. 1Cor.3.17If anyone destroys the temple of God, God will destroy that person. For the temple of God is holy, and you are that temple.
  13. Prov.1.10My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent.
  14. Luke.23.43And he said to him, "Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise."

Notes

  1. 1rumigerulas (gossipy/tale-bearing) is a rare form; the sense is 'rumor-spreading' or 'gossipy.'
  2. 2hiis is a late/medieval spelling of his (dat./abl. pl.). Rendered as 'to these' → 'They' for natural English.
  3. 3vinose and lasciue are adverbial uses of uncertain morphology; rendered as 'wine-soaked and wanton' to capture the sense of debauched, loose speech.
  4. 4mediatrices and conciliatrices are rare formations meaning 'female brokers/go-betweens' and 'female reconcilers/matchmakers' — here used pejoratively as 'brokers and pimps.'
  5. 5uipere (ablative of vipera) rendered as 'viper's' modifying 'tongue.'
  6. 6sugget is an uncertain verb form (possibly = sugat/sugit, 'sucks'); rendered as 'will suck.'
  7. 7Joel 3:3 (Vulgate numbering) — 'They have cast lots for my people, and have given a boy for a harlot, and sold a girl for wine, that they drink.' The quotation here is adapted/paraphrased. Job 20:16 (Vulgate) — 'It shall suck the poison of asps; the viper's tongue shall slay him.' Both are candidate allusions pending Moses resolution.
  8. 8The reference 'ad romanos ultimo: unde sunt lamie infernales' does not correspond to a standard Vulgate verse in Romans; likely a paraphrase or gloss. The Lamentations 4 quotation echoes Lam 4:3 but with variant wording ('lamie nudauerunt mammas'). Both are candidate scripture allusions pending Moses resolution.
  9. 9The quotation 'Fili, si te lactauerint peccatores, non acquiescas eis' corresponds to Prov 1:10 (Vulgate). Candidate scripture allusion pending Moses resolution.
  10. 10The abbreviation 'sc.' expands to 'scilicet' (namely), introducing the thief's soul (the penitent thief of Luke 23:43). The sentence is incomplete in the source, continuing in s5.
  11. 11The comparison of the corrupting old woman to the basilisk draws on Isidore of Seville's etymological tradition (likely Etymologiae 12.4). The basilisk's lethal hiss symbolizes the destructive power of seductive speech before any overt act.

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