The second Revelation is of His discolouryng etc; of our redemption, and the discolouring of the vernacle; and how it plesith God we seke Him besily, abiding Him stedfastly and trusting Hym mightily. Tenth chapter.

The Discoloring of His Face

Julian sees the face of the crucifix discolor from the Passion, and is taught that seeking and beholding God are the soul's proper work, confirmed by the vision of the holy vernicle.

And after this I saw with my physical sight, in the face of the crucifix that hung before me, which I was looking at continuously, a part of His Passion—contempt, spitting and fouling, and buffeting, and many lingering pains, more than I can tell, and frequent changes of color.^✦ And at one time I saw how half the face, beginning at the ear, was covered with dry blood until it closed over as far as the middle of the face. And after that, the other half closed over in the same way, and meanwhile it vanished on this side, just as it had come. I saw this with bodily sight—dimly and darkly—and I longed for more bodily sight so I could have seen more clearly. And I was answered in my reason: If God wills to show you more, He will be your light; you need nothing but Him.^✦ For I saw Him and sought Him, for we are now so blind and so unwise that we never seek God until He, of His goodness, shows Himself to us.^✦ And when we see anything of Him by grace, then we are stirred by the same grace to seek with great desire to see Him more blissfully. And so I saw Him and sought Him, and I had Him and I lacked Him. And this is, and should be, our common work in this, as I see it. Once my understanding was led down to the seabed, and there I saw green hills and valleys, as if overgrown with moss, seaweed, and gravel.¹ Then I understood this: that if a man or a woman were under the broad water, if they could see God—as God is with a person continually—they would be safe in body and soul and take no harm; and beyond that, they would have more solace and comfort than all this world can describe.² For He wants us to believe that we see Him continually, even though to us it seems only a little; and in this belief He continually makes us gain grace. For He wants to be seen, and He wants to be sought; He wants to be waited for, and He wants to be trusted. This second showing was so lowly, so small, and so simple that my spirits were in great distress while I gazed on it — mourning, fearful, and longing.³ For I was sometimes in doubt whether it was a showing.⁴ And then, at various times, our good Lord gave me more sight, by which I truly understood that it was a showing. It was a figure and likeness of our foul, dead flesh — the covering our fair, bright, blessed Lord bore for our sins.⁵ It made me think of the holy vernicle of Rome, which He portrayed with His own blessed face when He was in His hard Passion, willingly going to His death and often changing color.⁶ Of the brownness and blackness, the ruefulness and leanness of this image, many marvel how it could be, seeing that He portrayed it with His blessed face, which is the fair head of Heaven, the flower of earth, and the fruit of the maiden's womb.⁷ Then how could this image be so discolored and so far from fair?

Our Likeness Restored

Julian explains how the Trinity made us in Its image, and how Christ in the Incarnation took on our foulness to restore us to His likeness, as shown in the vernicle.

I want to speak just as I've understood by the grace of God. We know in our faith, and believe by the teaching and preaching of Holy Church, that the blessed Trinity made humankind in His image and in His likeness. In the same way we know that when man fell so deep and so wretchedly by sin, there was no other help to restore man except through Him who made man.⁸ And He who made man for love would, by that same love, restore man to the same bliss — and even beyond it.⁹ And just as we were made like the Trinity in our first making, our Maker wills that we should be like Jesus Christ, our Savior in Heaven without end, by the power of our remaking.¹⁰ Then between these two He would, for love and for the honor of man, make Himself as like to man in this mortal life — in our foulness and our wretchedness — as a human being could be without guilt.¹¹ This means, as was said before: it was the image and likeness of our foul, black, dead body, in which our fair, bright, blessed Lord God is hidden.¹² But I can say with full certainty — and we ought to believe — that never was there so fair a man as He, until the time when His fair coloring was changed by toil and sorrow and passion, dying.¹³ This is spoken of in the eighth Revelation, where it treats more of that same likeness. And there it says of the vernicle of Rome that it moves through various changes of color and expression, sometimes more comforting and lifelike, and sometimes more pitiful and deathlike, as can be seen in the eighth Revelation.¹⁴¹⁵

The Work of Seeking and Trusting

Julian teaches that the soul's continual seeking, suffering, and trusting pleases God, and that we are to seek with faith, hope, and love, awaiting His sudden and blissful appearing.

And this vision was a teaching to my understanding: that the soul's continual seeking pleases God very greatly, for it can do no more than seek, suffer, and trust. And this is worked in the soul that has it by the Holy Spirit. And the clarity of finding comes from His special grace when it is His will. Seeking with faith, hope, and love pleases our Lord, and the finding pleases the soul and fills it with joy.^✦¹⁶ And so I was taught in my understanding that seeking is as good as beholding for the time He will allow the soul to be in travail.¹⁷ It is God's will that we seek Him toward the beholding of Him, for by that He will show us Himself of His special grace when He wills.¹⁸ And how a soul should conduct itself in His beholding, He Himself will teach; and that is the greatest honor to Him and profit to yourself, and it receives most of meekness and virtues with the grace and leading of the Holy Spirit.¹⁹ For a soul that only fastens itself to God with true trust, whether by seeking or in beholding, it is the greatest honor it can do Him, as I see it. These are two workings that may be seen in this vision. One is seeking; the other is beholding. Seeking is common: every soul may have it by His grace, and ought to have it, along with the discretion and teaching of Holy Church.²⁰ It is God's will that we have three things in our seeking. The first is that we seek willingly and diligently, without sloth, as far as we can through His grace — gladly and cheerfully, without unreasonable heaviness and empty sorrow.²¹ The second is that we wait for Him steadfastly for His love, without grumbling and without striving against Him, to the end of our lives — for it will last only a while; the third, that we trust in Him mightily with fully assured faith, for it is His will. We know He will appear suddenly and blissfully to all His lovers, for His working is hidden, and He wills to be perceived; and His appearing will be very sudden, and He wills to be trusted, for He is fully gracious and familiar.²² Blessed may He be.

Read the original Middle English

And after this I saw with bodily sight, in the face of the crucifix that henge before me in the which I behelde continualy, a parte of His passion - despite, spitting and sollowing, and buffetting and many langoryng peynes, mo than I can tel, and often changing of colour. And one time I saw how halfe the face, begyning at the ere, overrede with drie blode til it beclosid to the mid-face. And after that, the tuther halfe beclosyd on the same wise, and therewhiles it vanyssched in this party, even as it came. This saw I bodily - swemely and derkely, and I desired more bodily sight to have sene more clerely. And I was answered in my reason: If God wil shew thee more, He shal be thy light; thee nedith none but Him. For I saw Him and sowte Hym, for we arn now so blynd and so unwise that we never sekyn God til He of His godenes shewith Him to us. And we ought se of Him graciously, than arn we sterid by the same grace to sekyn with gret desire to se Him more blisfully. And thus I saw Him and sowte Him, and I had Him and I wantid Hym.

And this is and should be our comon werkeyng in this, as to my sight.

One tyme mine understondyng was led downe into the see ground, and there I saw hill and dalis grene, semand, as it were, mosse begrowne, with wrekke and with gravel. Than I understode thus, that if a man or a woman were under the broade watyr, if he might have sight of God, so as God is with a man continually, he should be save in body and soule and take no harme; and, overpassing, he should have mor solace and comfort than al this world can telle. For He will that we levyn that we se Him continually thowe that us thinkeith that it be but litl, and in this beleve He makith us evermore to getyn grace. For He will be sene and He wil be sowte, He wil be abedyn and He wil be trosted.

This second sheweing was so low and so litil and so simple that my sprets were in grete travel in the beholding, mornand, dredfull, and longand. For I was sum time in doute whither it was a shewing. And than divers times our gode Lord gave me more sight whereby I understode treuly that it was a shewing. It was a figure and likenes of our foule dede hame, that our faire, bright, blissid Lord bare for our sins. It made me to thinke of the holy vernacle of Rome which He hath portrayed with His owne blissid face whan He was in His herd passion wilfully going to His deth and often chongyng of colour. Of the brownehede and blakehede, reulihede and lenehede of this image, many mervel how it might be, stondyng He portraied it with His blissid face, which is the faire hede of Heavyn, flowre of erth, and the fruite of the mayden wombe. Than how might this image be so discolouring and so fer fro faire?

I desire to sey like as I have understond be the grace of God. We know in our faith and beleve be the teaching and preching of Holy Church, that the blissid Trinite made mankinde to His image and to His likenes. In the same maner wise we knowen that whan man felle so deepe and so wretchidly be synne, there was none other helpe to restore man but throw Him that made man. And that made man for love, be the same love He would restore man to the same blisse and overpassing. And like as we were like made to the Trinite in our first makyng, our Maker would that we should be like Jesus Criste, our Saviour in Hevyn without ende, be the vertue of our geynmakyng. Than atwix these two He would, for love and worshippe of man, make Himselfe as like to man in this dedely life, in our foulehede and our wratchidnes, as man myght be without gilte. Whereof it meneith as it was aforseyd - it was the image and likenes of our foule blak dede hame wherein our faire bryte blissid Lord God is hid. But ful sekirly I dar sey, and we owen to trowen, that so faire a man was never none but He, till what tyme His faire colour was chongyd with travel and sorrow and passion, deyeng.

Of this it is spoken in the eighth Revelation where it tretith more of the same likenes. And there it seith of the vernacle of Rome, it mevyth be dyvers chongyng of colour and chere, sometyme more comfortably and lively and sometime more rewfull and dedely, as it may be seene in the eighth Revelation.

And this vision was a lernyng to myn understondyng that the continual sekyng of the soule plesith God ful mekyl, for it may do no more than sekyn, suffrin, and trusten. And this wrought in the soule that hath it be the Holy Ghost. And the clernes of fyndyng is of His special grace whan it is His will. The sekyng with feith, hope, and charite plesyth our Lord, and the finding plesyth the soule and fulfillith it with joy. And thus was I lernyd to myn understondyng, that sekyng is as good as beholdyng for the tyme that He will suffer the soule to be in travel. It is God wille that we seke Him to the beholdyng of Him, for be that He shall shew us Himselfe of His special grace whan He wil. And how a soule shall have him in His beholdyng, He shal teche Himselfe; and that is most worshipp to Him and profitt to thyselfe, and most receivith of mekenes and vertues with the grace and ledyng of the Holy Goste. For a soule that only festenith him on to God with very troste, either be sekyng or in beholdyng, it is the most worshipp that he may don to Him, as to my sight.

These arn two werkyng that mown be seene in this vision. That on is sekyng; the other is beholdyng. The sekyng is common; that, every soule may have with His grace, and owith to have, that discretion and techyng of the Holy Church. It is God wil that we have thre things in our sekyng. The first is that we sekyn wilfully and bisily withouten slauth as it may be throw His grace, gladly and merili withoute onskilful hevynes and veyne sorow. The second is that we abide Him stedfastly for His love withoute gruching and striveing ageyns Him in our lives end, for it shall lesten but a while; the thred, that we trosten in Him mightily of ful sekird feith, for it is His wil. We knowen He shall appere sodenly and blisfully to al His lovers, for His werkyng is privy, and He wil be perceivid; and His appering shal be swith sodeyn, and He wil be trowid, for He is full hend and homley. Blissid mot He ben.

Scripture echoes

↩Matt.26.67;Mark.14.65 — Then they spat in his face and struck him, and some slapped him, Mark.14.65 — And some began to spit on him, to cover his face, to strike him, and to say to him, 'Prophesy!' And the guards received him with blows.
↩Ps.27.1;Isa.60.19;John.1.9 — Of David. The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life; whom shall I dread? Isa.60.19 — No longer shall the sun be your light by day, nor for brightness shall the moon give light to you; but the LORD will be your everlasting light, and your God will be your glory. John.1.9 — The true light, which gives light to everyone, was coming into the world.
↩Isa.65.1;Rom.3.11;John.6.44 — I was found by those who did not seek me; I said, "Here I am, here I am," to a nation that did not call on my name. Rom.3.11 — There is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks God. John.6.44 — No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him, and I will raise him up on the last day.
↩1Cor.13.13 — And now faith, hope, and love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Notes

1 ↩enm 'wrekke' rendered as 'wrack' (seaweed/jetsam on the sea floor).
2 ↩enm 'overpassing' rendered as 'beyond that' (moreover / what is more).
3 ↩ME travel here means travail: labor, distress, and hard strain of spirit, not journeying.
4 ↩ME whither is read as whether (doubt about authenticity), not as a place-word.
5 ↩ME foule dede hame is Julian's distinctive phrase for the foul covering of mortal flesh / dead skin-garment of fallen humanity that Christ took on; rendered here as foul dead flesh / covering.
6 ↩vernacle = the vernicle (Veronica's veil), the relic cloth said to bear Christ's face; herd passion = hard Passion (severe suffering).
7 ↩ME reulihede is ambiguous: commonly taken as ruefulness/pitifulness (from reuly/rueful), though some readers hear a physical quality parallel to brownness/blackness/leanness (e.g. ruddiness or roughness). Ruefulness preferred here as the best-supported sense.
8 ↩Source 'throw' is Middle English 'through' (by means of), not modern 'throw'.
9 ↩'overpassing' is Julian's term for bliss that surpasses the original; rendered as 'and even beyond it'.
10 ↩'geynmakyng' (again-making) rendered as 'remaking' — Julian's term for redemption/restoration in Christ.
11 ↩'worshippe of man' rendered as 'honor of man' (human dignity), not cultic worship. 'atwix these two' = between first making and remaking.
12 ↩'dede hame' = dead covering/flesh/body; kept in line with the earlier 'foule dede hame' of this chapter.
13 ↩'travel' here is Middle English travail (toil/suffering), not modern journeying.
14 ↩vernicle: the Veronica cloth at Rome, the relic traditionally held to bear the imprint of Christ's face; kept as the established English term rather than paraphrased as 'Veronica's veil'.
15 ↩ME comfortably here means consoling/comforting (not 'at ease'); rewfull = pitiful/sorrowful; dedely = deathlike, contrasting lively.
16 ↩enm charite in the faith–hope–charity triad; rendered love per default lexeme policy (theological-virtue triad).
17 ↩enm travel = travail (spiritual labor/toil), not journeying; suffer = allow/permit.
18 ↩enm be that rendered by that (instrumental/means); to the beholdyng read as seeking directed toward beholding.
19 ↩enm have him = conduct/comport oneself; worshipp = honor paid to God, not a worship service.
20 ↩ME punctuation is compressed: 'that...owith to have, that discretion...' can be read as seeking itself being what every soul may and ought to have, under the Church's discretion and teaching. The rendering keeps both the common availability of seeking and the Church's guidance.
21 ↩'onskilful hevynes' is ME for heaviness without skill/reason — gloomy weight that is not true compunction. 'veyne sorow' is empty or fruitless sorrow, kept distinct from grace-pierced contrition.
22 ↩Julian's 'homley' is her distinctive word for God's intimate, approachable nearness; rendered here as 'familiar.' 'hend' = gracious/courteous. 'wil be perceivid/trowid' taken as divine willing (He wants to be perceived and trusted), not mere future tense.

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